Survivor Week 2: He's a Creeper

Wow, what a full episode!  I'm digging this season. 

First up, Semhar is at redemption island.  She apparenty has abandonment issues...she raps about it... yea, it's annoying as hell.

Woody knows he needs to stop being a total nerd and man up.  Easier said than done I think.  Oz and Keith are getting pretty chummy. 

Coach has his alliance with Brandon, Sophie, Rick and Albert.  But he's got the hots for Edna.  She isn't in his alliance but he's "friends" with her.  Hmmm.  They discuss whether or not Christine has the idol.  Decide Christine and Stacey are too tight. 

Back to Woody, he's working it.  Cutting those coconuts, over and over.  Dude, learn a new trick!  He says his mommy wouldn't like him using a machete.  hahahahaha.  I got $10 he still lives with her. 

Ozzie goes idol hunting and bang, finds it.  He is gonna be a strong force in this game. 

OMG, so Brandon feels bad deceiving Coach about who his uncle is.  They go for a walk and Brandon does some scripture quoting, which frankly gets up my ASS, then he tells him who he really is.  Coach is floored.  "I don't want to be played again".  Coach decides to trust him for now.  And then they hold hands and pray.  For christ sake...

On red, the guys go fishing.  Oz and Keith are already in an alliance but they let Jim think it's all his idea.  FYI-Keith wears red underwear. You didn't really think I wasn't gonna comment on that, did you?  They decide to include Elyse and Whitney. 

Blue: Mikayla is a tough girl, who has no qualms stripping down to her underwear and getting shit done.  Brandon is all nuts about her.  Calls her Parvati, says she's using her seduction.  Seriously, I expect him to start beating himself to stop his penis from tingling. 

Christine is still looking for the idol, and freakishly she is the only one looking.  Finds the clue but can't decide if she should share it with anyone. 

Challenge time.  Jeff is in light blue.  The blue team arrives all eating pandara fruit, because the team that eats pandara stays together.  Uhuh, they really said this. 

Ok, it's a freaking may pole challenge.  Skip around and unwrap ribbons to get keys, unlock the tribe mates and move crates in a giant puzzle.  Wanna know what you're playing for?  Immunity, plus pillows and blankets. 

May pole, Woody is expectedly lame.  Dawn's lame too.  Blue goes into the puzzle with a big lead, and then blows it.  Red wins. 

Back at camp, Christine complains that the guys lost the challenge.  Bye bye Christine!  Coach wants a 3 way split, with their 6 voting for Christine and Stacey. 

Brandon wants Mikayla gone so his penis will stop swelling up.  He's gone to medical about it twice now.  Ok, they didn't actually show that.  Brandon tells coach she has to go or he can't be faithful to his wife.  Riiiiight, like Mikayla is just waiting to get a piece of that.  He's a total creeper and future sex offender, I am convinced.  What is it day 4??  He's running around trying to get everyone else to go with Mikayla. 

Christine and Stacey are freaking out, as is Mikayla.  Edna gives her some cover story about who they are voting for and Christine tells her flat out she's messing up her own lies.  Christine goes idol searching...

Coach is getting annoyed with Brandon.  But Brandon says, Mikayla, period.  Wow. 

Tribal Council: Yep, Dark blue.  He totally reads my blog.

Brandon says his first impression has been good. 
Coach says he thought his first impression wasn't that great.  And then BANG, he tells Jeff that he's heard Christine and Stacey are planning to vote out Mikayla.
What??  Stacey goes nuts. 
Christine says she doesn't want Mikayla to go. 
Mikayla says, I'm strong, I don't get this!
Stacey-I've never even talked to Coach! 
Christine: "from whom did you hear it, Mr. Honesty?"
Coach: Christine's been looking for the idol all day
Christine-obviously Coach is threatened by me.  He's hurt because he's a temporary player. 
Mikayla: Jeff, you haven't asked Christine and Stacey if they said they were voting for me.
They both deny it.
Brandon-Ahhhhhh, I can't lie, I'm the one who told Christine and Stacey to vote for Mikayla. 
Mikayla "welcome to survivor"
Albert: it's great when the truth finally comes out...

Time to vote.
Sophie, one vote. Edna, one vote, Stacey, 3 votes and the person vote off is Christine with 4.