Woohooo! Final 3, baby.
This week's episode started and stayed in Moscow. Teams had to find a nuclear sub and "find the actor from The Hunt for Red October". Seriously, show of hands now, who thought it was gonna be Sean Connery? Nope. Some no name actor that the Race didn't even have enough respect to give a name to.
Ok, so first let me go back and state for the record, that I honestly don't believe for an American TV show that you should be able to cavort on a nuclear sub. There is NO FRIGGIN WAY that this was a real nuclear sub. Maybe a Bush/Palin "NUCULAR" sub, but those aren't real anyway. I so hope the Amazing Race never comes out to Limerick and has people scale the cooling towers.
Anywhoo, everyone jumps into taxi's (again, with the Russian KGB-spy drivers) and draws a stick figure of sub. Me? I'd of had rays shooting off of it just so the driver knew I wanted the RADIOACTIVE sub.
Everyone gets to the sub at the same time and all rush in, and run around the sub saying, "clue? clue?" Finally, they find the heavily made up ACTOR captain, who is on the phone with his agent trying to find out what this gig is paying. He gives them their next clues: take a taxi to the graveyard of fallen monuments. Which is not grammatically correct because, from what I saw, all of the monuments were right side up, but were of fallen HEROES.
The Cheaters jump in the spy-taxi with GPS. MASSIVE TRAFFIC. Maybe the big 3 automakers should go there to sell their cars?
Roadblock. One teammate had to be "good at solving mysteries...literally". For the roadblock, one teammate had to count the number of Lenin and Stalin statues (6 and 2) , put the separate numbers together, then take a cab to a store where, if their numbers were correct, a shopkeeper would give them a book by the a mystery writer; at the book's page with the same number as the statue total, there would be a clue to an address where the teammate's partner would be waiting. Phew. In case you didn't guess I cut and pasted that sentence from the cbs website. Seriously, it was really confusing. Give me Survivor where all I have to do is tell ya that the unwashed have to lob a ball onto a sheet with circles on it, and get closest to the middle circle. Now, I didn't hear this part in the reading of the clue but everyone gives this member of the team their passport and all their money. This should have been accompanied by dramatic music, since we'd all seen the promos and know some tool loses their passport and $$.
The Frats go to the wrong park.
Nick gets to the park, counts the monuments, goes to the bookstore and gets the right answer. bada-bing. He's off to the famous author's house where their partners are all waiting. The Cheaters argue the whole way in the cab to the cemetery. Tina Cheater wants Ken to tell the KGB agent to put out his cigarette. Ken refuses, just to piss her off. She close her eyes and puts her finger on her forehead to press Ken's image out of her head. As a result, storm clouds gather over the cab and by the time they get to the Roadblock it is raining. Tina doesn't want to chance having her eyebrows wash off, so she takes her time getting a raincoat out of her bag. This exasperates Ken. Tina counts the dead heads, and heads off.
Dallas goes into the park to count the Lenins and Stalins. Cut to mom who is waiting at the author's house and saying, "I paid a lot of money for his education, but I'm not sure he's gonna know how to tell the difference" . LOL. The funniest part is that she paid money to educate this monkey.
Dallas gets to the bookstore and gives the wrong answer, getting a 10 minute penalty. He counted 6 Stalins and 3 Lenins (but one was John), so he's never gonna get this combination right. Tina Cheater counts 5 Stalin and 2 Lenins, but she's not sure of the Stalins. She gets it wrong and gets a penalty. I lost track how many times Dallas got this wrong, but he and Tina Cheater compare notes and they figure out the right numbers. Tina helps Dallas with the higher math and, when she tells Ken Cheater, he gets all pissed off that she helped him. Seriously, these two needs meds.
Meanwhile, Nick and Starr get their next clue: find a lady in the park with a pony. LOL. Sounds like something illicit on an internet chat sight. I didn't realize Shetland ponies are Russian. Detour: take the rails or the lines. I gotta copy this one too cause it's so ridiculously complex:
In Ride the Rails, teams had to make their way on foot to the Sokol’niky Metro Station, where they had to catch the metro to Ulitsa 1905 and find a marked snack shop to receive a traditional pastry known as a samsa. The wrapper of the samsa would direct them to another train to Kitay-Gorod Station in order to find the statue dedicated to the man who created the Cyrillic alphabet (seriously, this is ridiculous and gratuitous information). In exchange for the pastry, a nearby babushka would hand teams a postcard with the name and picture of their final location, VNDKh Park Station.
In Ride the Lines, teams made their way on foot to a bus stop near Sokol’niky Park and hop on a trolley bus to a station called Krasndsel’skaya. Then, they had to find a key maker who would give them a storage locker key, before hopping on another trolleybus to a station called Rizhskaya. When they arrived, they had to search the station for a locker that matched their key, open it, and also retrieve a postcard with the name and picture of their final destination, VNDKh Park Station.
Got it? Ok, right about now Frats get to the right park and wisely get a real live Russian to help them figure out the monuments. They come up with 6 Stalins and 1 Lenins. He gets it wrong the first time.
And, now the moment we've all been dreading... when Dallas gets out of the cab at the author's apartment he leaves his money and passport in the cab. Now, this kind of pissed me off and if I had these 2 as MY pool pick I would have been freaking out, cause it seemed to me he didn't do much to stop the cab. I would have screamed like a banshee (seriously, when traveling outside the US I manically check and recheck my passport about every 10 seconds), and thrown my backpack at the back window of the cab. But, I guess he figured mommy would take care of it. Deep breath. Ok, so they figure they will still try to finish the Detour, but to save money, they take the subway instead of a cab as specified in the clue. Also, they panhandle the money for the subway with ease. Apparently Russian money is totally useless since everyone is willing to give it away.
Nick and Starr ride the rails with ease, commenting about a million times how living in NYC has come in handy. They finish easily and get their next clue to proceed to the Pitt stop where they are once again first and win trips to Anguilla. They are assured a spot in the final 3. I hate them.
Toni and Dallas and the Frats get to the Shetland Pony lady at the same time, but Toni and Dallas have to go back and take a cab instead of riding the subway. The Frats get their Speedbump, and with the challenges on this leg so far, I was dreading hearing what they had to do. Speedbump: they have to perform with Russian dancers. haha. You know the producers just made this up after seeing the marching. I thought this would be the end of them given the total lack of coordination of the one dude. They have to repeat it twice but finally finish.
Toni and Dallas borrow money and go back to the author's house where they also get money to take a cab, return to the Pony lady and start panhandling to ride the rails.
The Cheaters ride the lines but get on the wrong kind of bus. Keeeeeeennnnnn. God, her voice is killing me. The Frats do either the lines or the rails. Lines I think. By this time my head was hurting. Both teams end up at the station, Tina and Ken are kind of lost and arguing. The Frats spot the clue box and head on out to meet Phil. Frats are team number 2. Cheaters cheat and just see Phil and the mat and step on it. Phil tells them that they are team # 3 buuuuut, they missed the final clue. They panic and run all around the station. Fortunately for ME, Toni and Dallas are horribly behind. Cheaters step on the mat and get the final spot. (Ginnie: how big was the drama at your house??)
Phil gets tired of waiting for Toni and Dallas, so he goes out and finds them in the street and tells them it's all over. Toni cries, they both say "I love you" over and over again. I wonder what will happen with Starr and Dallas' romance??
Showing posts with label Fall 08 Amazing Race. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fall 08 Amazing Race. Show all posts
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Amazing Race Week 5
Thank you, cbs.com for putting the entire episode online this year and saving my ass, since my VCR crapped out on me. This summary is being done in real time as I watch.
Where did we leave the race? Oh yeah, New Zealand with the Cheaters in first and Starr nursing an injured arm. Teams have to fly to Cambodia and find a gas pumping place for their next clue.
At the Auckland airport there's a "Flight Centre" area where you can apparently check on all flights. Not sure if this really exists or if it's something Travelocity put in just for the show. Cheaters find out there are only 2 flights available, the first at 12:25 pm to Singapore. "Oooh, Terence and Sarah might not make it". Cut to Terence and Sarah driving down the highway and getting pulled over for doing 117 in a 100 zone. Sarah: "Damn, that surprises me 'cause I always thought you drove like a little old woman". T/S get to the airport and are able to make the INTERNATIONAL FLIGHT with only minutes to spare. Huh. How is that even possible and, is it me, or is there no security checkpoints OR OTHER TRAVELERS in Auckland??
Nick and Starr leave the pitt. Starr's arm is amazingly healed. Andrew and Dan leave the pitt "Where the hell is Cambodia??"
Next flight leaves at 4:55 pm. Trouble in the Flight Center as Kelly and Christy mock Dallas's hair, now calling him Teen Wolf. Man, I know I went to high school with these bitches' mothers. These 2 teams plus Nick and Starr get on the second flight. Andrew and Dan are trying to book it, Dan is dancing around all happy when they agent tells him it's doubtful. Hey, where were these oh so friggin helpful ticket agents, calling the gate and stuff, when I used to travel?? Clearly we are not using American Airlines for this leg of the race. No chance of getting on today's flights. Meanwhile, Aja and Ty are still driving to the airport.
Commercial break
Once we're back, Andrew and Dan manage to ask the ticket agent (and, again, there are no friggin people in this airport) at Emirates Airlines and lo and behold, they do make the flight. I wonder if Emirates flies to Seattle??
The second flight catches up with the first in Singapore. Aja and Ty use their time arguing about why Aja has to ask for a kiss. Well, if you have to ask...
Taxi race to wing wang road (or something like that). Kelly and Christy's driver takes them to a gas station, where they run around yelling "Clue Box" and someone points them to the restroom. So, next time you are in Cambodia and have to pee, just start yelling "Clue Box". Once at the gas station, teams have to chose a truck and use possibly the most unsafe method I have ever friggin seen to fill the gas tanks with 25 gallons of diesel. Seriously, this is whack. I think it might be safer to suck the gas up the tube with your mouth and then fill the tank.
Nick and Starr get there first and finish first, Kelly and Christie are touring all of the gas stations in Cambodia. Teams now have to go to ying yang something or other, which is SE Asia's biggest lake (haha, like we all didn't already know that!) and take some crappy looking boat to a floating restaurant.
Andrew and Dan, of course can't get their thingy to pump. Don't know why cause it looks like a damn big old keg. Ken: "dudes, it's just like pulling down the zipper and letting it fly". And, now we know why he's called the Cheater. Toni and Dallas done, Cheaters are done, Terence and Sarah done.
Aja and Ty just now arrive in Cambodia, which seems really fast to me.
Kelly and Christie, done. Frats still scratching their asses. Dan gets it going finally.
Big boat race to the restaurant, following a big flat bed truck race to the boats. Cheaters keep getting passed. Aja and Ty seem to be catching up but who knows with the editing. Ah, finally, time out for the "wow these people are living in poverty" speech, this one by Kelly/Christie. I mean, there's not even a Nordstroms for miles. God, I hope they don't have to eat anything here. Terence and Sarah's boat breaks down right near the restaurant. Terence rows. Hey, Sarah, get your fat ass back and row.
Detour: Village life or Village Work. Village life-teams have to pick up 3 items. For some reason, a pair of joke teeth from the dentist, a doll from the tailor and a basketball, which each member has to shoot into a basket. Here I thought Village life was hard! in Village work, teams wade in the muddy water to a fishing area, search among the traps for a trap with fish in it and transfer the fist into baskets back at the dock. Um, I think it's a no brainer myself.
For some reason only the cheaters do the life thing, Nick/Starr and Toni/Dallas do the work thing which is looking harder. Can I just say again, that Toni is so under the radar but so tough. Terence and Sarah do life since they stumble upon the basketball court. Kelly and Christie come upon the basketball court and see the Cheaters so they decide to start throwing baskets. "Wait, do we need to find, like a clue box or something Kelly?" Frat boys do the fishing thing. This should be good.
After the detour, teams have to go to Ankhor something and find some temple. Roadblock (big shock there). One member has to search the grounds for a room called the echo chamber and thump their chests to make the echo. Nick gets it first, and it's on to the pitt. Nick lies to Mrs. Cheater on the way out in the most religious site in Cambodia. Niiiiice. Cheater woman walks in and out of the chamber, like twice. How the heck did she catch her husband cheating if she's so blind?? She finally finds the clue (did she thump her chest??) and then can't find her way out.
Team # 1-Nick and Starr. They win a trip to St. John, USVI.
Frats arrive at the temple. "Oh, look at that, it's the original Playboy Mansion".
It comes down to a race between the frats and Aja and Ty through some other temple, and Aja and Ty are the last team to arrive and are eliminated. Phil, playing Dr. Phil, asks, "so what's next? Do you hate each other?" No, Ty is moving to be with Aja. Awwwwwww. I give it 3 months.
Where did we leave the race? Oh yeah, New Zealand with the Cheaters in first and Starr nursing an injured arm. Teams have to fly to Cambodia and find a gas pumping place for their next clue.
At the Auckland airport there's a "Flight Centre" area where you can apparently check on all flights. Not sure if this really exists or if it's something Travelocity put in just for the show. Cheaters find out there are only 2 flights available, the first at 12:25 pm to Singapore. "Oooh, Terence and Sarah might not make it". Cut to Terence and Sarah driving down the highway and getting pulled over for doing 117 in a 100 zone. Sarah: "Damn, that surprises me 'cause I always thought you drove like a little old woman". T/S get to the airport and are able to make the INTERNATIONAL FLIGHT with only minutes to spare. Huh. How is that even possible and, is it me, or is there no security checkpoints OR OTHER TRAVELERS in Auckland??
Nick and Starr leave the pitt. Starr's arm is amazingly healed. Andrew and Dan leave the pitt "Where the hell is Cambodia??"
Next flight leaves at 4:55 pm. Trouble in the Flight Center as Kelly and Christy mock Dallas's hair, now calling him Teen Wolf. Man, I know I went to high school with these bitches' mothers. These 2 teams plus Nick and Starr get on the second flight. Andrew and Dan are trying to book it, Dan is dancing around all happy when they agent tells him it's doubtful. Hey, where were these oh so friggin helpful ticket agents, calling the gate and stuff, when I used to travel?? Clearly we are not using American Airlines for this leg of the race. No chance of getting on today's flights. Meanwhile, Aja and Ty are still driving to the airport.
Commercial break
Once we're back, Andrew and Dan manage to ask the ticket agent (and, again, there are no friggin people in this airport) at Emirates Airlines and lo and behold, they do make the flight. I wonder if Emirates flies to Seattle??
The second flight catches up with the first in Singapore. Aja and Ty use their time arguing about why Aja has to ask for a kiss. Well, if you have to ask...
Taxi race to wing wang road (or something like that). Kelly and Christy's driver takes them to a gas station, where they run around yelling "Clue Box" and someone points them to the restroom. So, next time you are in Cambodia and have to pee, just start yelling "Clue Box". Once at the gas station, teams have to chose a truck and use possibly the most unsafe method I have ever friggin seen to fill the gas tanks with 25 gallons of diesel. Seriously, this is whack. I think it might be safer to suck the gas up the tube with your mouth and then fill the tank.
Nick and Starr get there first and finish first, Kelly and Christie are touring all of the gas stations in Cambodia. Teams now have to go to ying yang something or other, which is SE Asia's biggest lake (haha, like we all didn't already know that!) and take some crappy looking boat to a floating restaurant.
Andrew and Dan, of course can't get their thingy to pump. Don't know why cause it looks like a damn big old keg. Ken: "dudes, it's just like pulling down the zipper and letting it fly". And, now we know why he's called the Cheater. Toni and Dallas done, Cheaters are done, Terence and Sarah done.
Aja and Ty just now arrive in Cambodia, which seems really fast to me.
Kelly and Christie, done. Frats still scratching their asses. Dan gets it going finally.
Big boat race to the restaurant, following a big flat bed truck race to the boats. Cheaters keep getting passed. Aja and Ty seem to be catching up but who knows with the editing. Ah, finally, time out for the "wow these people are living in poverty" speech, this one by Kelly/Christie. I mean, there's not even a Nordstroms for miles. God, I hope they don't have to eat anything here. Terence and Sarah's boat breaks down right near the restaurant. Terence rows. Hey, Sarah, get your fat ass back and row.
Detour: Village life or Village Work. Village life-teams have to pick up 3 items. For some reason, a pair of joke teeth from the dentist, a doll from the tailor and a basketball, which each member has to shoot into a basket. Here I thought Village life was hard! in Village work, teams wade in the muddy water to a fishing area, search among the traps for a trap with fish in it and transfer the fist into baskets back at the dock. Um, I think it's a no brainer myself.
For some reason only the cheaters do the life thing, Nick/Starr and Toni/Dallas do the work thing which is looking harder. Can I just say again, that Toni is so under the radar but so tough. Terence and Sarah do life since they stumble upon the basketball court. Kelly and Christie come upon the basketball court and see the Cheaters so they decide to start throwing baskets. "Wait, do we need to find, like a clue box or something Kelly?" Frat boys do the fishing thing. This should be good.
After the detour, teams have to go to Ankhor something and find some temple. Roadblock (big shock there). One member has to search the grounds for a room called the echo chamber and thump their chests to make the echo. Nick gets it first, and it's on to the pitt. Nick lies to Mrs. Cheater on the way out in the most religious site in Cambodia. Niiiiice. Cheater woman walks in and out of the chamber, like twice. How the heck did she catch her husband cheating if she's so blind?? She finally finds the clue (did she thump her chest??) and then can't find her way out.
Team # 1-Nick and Starr. They win a trip to St. John, USVI.
Frats arrive at the temple. "Oh, look at that, it's the original Playboy Mansion".
It comes down to a race between the frats and Aja and Ty through some other temple, and Aja and Ty are the last team to arrive and are eliminated. Phil, playing Dr. Phil, asks, "so what's next? Do you hate each other?" No, Ty is moving to be with Aja. Awwwwwww. I give it 3 months.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Amazing Race Week 3
Hootergate! This episode starts with the strangest accusations I've heard since my last McCain robocall. Christy accuses Starr of pushing her sports bra off the ledge at the last pitt stop. Christy and Kelly vow revenge. Um, I didn't think Christy's boobs were so big that the lack of a sports bra would disqualify them, but I maybe it was her lucky sports bra?
Teams must now fly to La Paz (not to be confused with La Pez, where everyone's neck spits out candy), which Phil informs us IS LITERALLLY BREATHTAKING. Once in La Paz, they have to find one of the many Simon Bolivar statues and wait for the morning paper delivery.
No airport drama this time around so we get lots if time for the teams to give their interviews. I go and get another beer at this point. Teams arrive in La Paz and find the traffic island with the Simon Bolivar statue. You know it's the right one because a woman IN WHAT IS TRADITIONAL BOLIVIAN GARB CIRCA 1950 hands them an AUTHENTIC BOLIVIAN BLANKET and they all settle down for a homeless sleepover.
Morning and everyone is putting on makeup and getting all gelled up for another day on TV. Nick takes the divorcees aside and tries to smooth things over with them related to hootergate. You immediately see WHY Christy and Kelly are divorced, when they still think Starr de-bra'd them at the last pitt stop. Nick walks away, no doubt muttering "bit^&s".
Sarah and Terence have decided to do a manage a trois and bring in a local girl to share in their miserable relationship. The newspapers are delivered and teams have to paw through the spanish newspapers to find the ad, IN A BOX AND IN ENGLISH, of a hat sale. Hmmm, that's rough. Teams have to make their way to a hat and shoe store and buy a TRADITIONAL CHOLITA HAT. Andrew and Dan find it first and jump in a cab, reading out loud "please hold on to your hat", ominously... The southern belles can't read and can't give the newspaper candy so they are the last to figure it out.
Detour: Music March or Bumpy Ride. "In Musical March, teams had to make their way on foot to two plazas several blocks apart where they needed to collect musicians and form a band. Then they had to make their way to Plaza Abaroa and exchange the band members for their next clue. In Bumpy Ride, teams made their way on foot to Mercado de las Brujas where they had to ride a locally crafted bicycle in a harrowing, bone rattling trip down cobblestone streets to Plaza Abaroa" (I'm just cutting and pasting that whole paragraph from cbs.com).
Locally crafted means "hewn" (I always wanted to use that word) out of wood. Actually they look like what Ax-murders get to do on craft day in prison. Andrew and Dan chose to make music together and TAKE OFF ON FOOT AS THE CLUE INSTRUCTS". Terence and Sarah jump in a cab to do the detour. Ooooooh. Good thing they have a spanish interpreter to help them out with the English clues. Mark and Bill miss that part as well and take a cab to the bike thing. Terence and Sarah read the clue in the cab, FREAK THE HELL OUT, and go back and walk on foot.
Music March: Andrew and Dan, Marissa and Brooke
Bikes: MARK/BILL, TERENCE/SARAH, KELLY/CHRISTY, TONI/DALLAS, NICK/STARR, KEN/TINA, TY/AJA
Anyone get why the bike riders have to wear helmets with feathers? I must have missed that part. What I didn't miss was the bad Karma getting beat out of Christy as she fell and SLAMMED her head against a wall while doing the bike challenge. (Becky-nice to hear you waited until you knew she was OK before laughing. I'm not that nice, obviously...). Mark is also almost killed when his "bike" careens through and intersection and is saved by a driver avoiding him. I expected the next Travelocity commercial to be all about their new "travel insurance".
Both detours arrive at the same plaza where a detour is waiting. (I'd explain what a detour is but Phil does a much better job) Also at the detour is the next clue directing them to Los Titanes Del Ring.
I have to hand it to Dallas and his mom. She is a real trooper and in pretty good shape. He lets her rest for a minute after completing the bike detour.
Arriving at Plaza , Nick & Starr propositioned Ty & Aja to U-turn Kelly & Christy.
The Cheaters arrive at Los titanes Del Ring and find out it's a ROADBLOCK. One team member has to hand over the hat to a lovely woman wrestler and then don tights and learn how to faux wrestle. Since the roadblock says, "who's ready for a fight", Ken heartily agrees. Ken looks really, um, like he's not going to be getting as many cheating opportunities once this clip is shown. He quickly learns the tricks and wrestles in front of the crowd. Tina is enjoying seeing him look like an idiot. They finish are receive their next clue to go to the Pitt stop. Although Ken made it look easy, a couple of the others have problems and have to go back for retraining.
Terence and Sarah see a red and yellow flag and have their cab driver stop while they investigate a local football game.
Waiting for Ty to wrestle, Aja walked up to Christy and told her that Starr asked them to U-turn Kelly & Christy. Hootergate is ON, baby.
Mark took 3 tries and a whiff of oxygen to finish the task.
Cheaters arrive first and a trip to Cabo, where Tina can continue her passive aggressive punishment. Apparently there's no penalty for Ken stealing the shirt, and I'm assuming the tights, from the wrestling roadblock.
Mark and Bill arrive at the Pitt Stop in 8th place, but receive a 30 minute penalty. Kelly and Christy step on the mat expecting to be eliminated but Phil is pleased to tell them that because of the penalty, they are in 8th place and have not been eliminated. Mark and Bill, on the other hand, are eliminated.
Teams must now fly to La Paz (not to be confused with La Pez, where everyone's neck spits out candy), which Phil informs us IS LITERALLLY BREATHTAKING. Once in La Paz, they have to find one of the many Simon Bolivar statues and wait for the morning paper delivery.
No airport drama this time around so we get lots if time for the teams to give their interviews. I go and get another beer at this point. Teams arrive in La Paz and find the traffic island with the Simon Bolivar statue. You know it's the right one because a woman IN WHAT IS TRADITIONAL BOLIVIAN GARB CIRCA 1950 hands them an AUTHENTIC BOLIVIAN BLANKET and they all settle down for a homeless sleepover.
Morning and everyone is putting on makeup and getting all gelled up for another day on TV. Nick takes the divorcees aside and tries to smooth things over with them related to hootergate. You immediately see WHY Christy and Kelly are divorced, when they still think Starr de-bra'd them at the last pitt stop. Nick walks away, no doubt muttering "bit^&s".
Sarah and Terence have decided to do a manage a trois and bring in a local girl to share in their miserable relationship. The newspapers are delivered and teams have to paw through the spanish newspapers to find the ad, IN A BOX AND IN ENGLISH, of a hat sale. Hmmm, that's rough. Teams have to make their way to a hat and shoe store and buy a TRADITIONAL CHOLITA HAT. Andrew and Dan find it first and jump in a cab, reading out loud "please hold on to your hat", ominously... The southern belles can't read and can't give the newspaper candy so they are the last to figure it out.
Detour: Music March or Bumpy Ride. "In Musical March, teams had to make their way on foot to two plazas several blocks apart where they needed to collect musicians and form a band. Then they had to make their way to Plaza Abaroa and exchange the band members for their next clue. In Bumpy Ride, teams made their way on foot to Mercado de las Brujas where they had to ride a locally crafted bicycle in a harrowing, bone rattling trip down cobblestone streets to Plaza Abaroa" (I'm just cutting and pasting that whole paragraph from cbs.com).
Locally crafted means "hewn" (I always wanted to use that word) out of wood. Actually they look like what Ax-murders get to do on craft day in prison. Andrew and Dan chose to make music together and TAKE OFF ON FOOT AS THE CLUE INSTRUCTS". Terence and Sarah jump in a cab to do the detour. Ooooooh. Good thing they have a spanish interpreter to help them out with the English clues. Mark and Bill miss that part as well and take a cab to the bike thing. Terence and Sarah read the clue in the cab, FREAK THE HELL OUT, and go back and walk on foot.
Music March: Andrew and Dan, Marissa and Brooke
Bikes: MARK/BILL, TERENCE/SARAH, KELLY/CHRISTY, TONI/DALLAS, NICK/STARR, KEN/TINA, TY/AJA
Anyone get why the bike riders have to wear helmets with feathers? I must have missed that part. What I didn't miss was the bad Karma getting beat out of Christy as she fell and SLAMMED her head against a wall while doing the bike challenge. (Becky-nice to hear you waited until you knew she was OK before laughing. I'm not that nice, obviously...). Mark is also almost killed when his "bike" careens through and intersection and is saved by a driver avoiding him. I expected the next Travelocity commercial to be all about their new "travel insurance".
Both detours arrive at the same plaza where a detour is waiting. (I'd explain what a detour is but Phil does a much better job) Also at the detour is the next clue directing them to Los Titanes Del Ring.
I have to hand it to Dallas and his mom. She is a real trooper and in pretty good shape. He lets her rest for a minute after completing the bike detour.
Arriving at Plaza , Nick & Starr propositioned Ty & Aja to U-turn Kelly & Christy.
The Cheaters arrive at Los titanes Del Ring and find out it's a ROADBLOCK. One team member has to hand over the hat to a lovely woman wrestler and then don tights and learn how to faux wrestle. Since the roadblock says, "who's ready for a fight", Ken heartily agrees. Ken looks really, um, like he's not going to be getting as many cheating opportunities once this clip is shown. He quickly learns the tricks and wrestles in front of the crowd. Tina is enjoying seeing him look like an idiot. They finish are receive their next clue to go to the Pitt stop. Although Ken made it look easy, a couple of the others have problems and have to go back for retraining.
Terence and Sarah see a red and yellow flag and have their cab driver stop while they investigate a local football game.
Waiting for Ty to wrestle, Aja walked up to Christy and told her that Starr asked them to U-turn Kelly & Christy. Hootergate is ON, baby.
Mark took 3 tries and a whiff of oxygen to finish the task.
Cheaters arrive first and a trip to Cabo, where Tina can continue her passive aggressive punishment. Apparently there's no penalty for Ken stealing the shirt, and I'm assuming the tights, from the wrestling roadblock.
Mark and Bill arrive at the Pitt Stop in 8th place, but receive a 30 minute penalty. Kelly and Christy step on the mat expecting to be eliminated but Phil is pleased to tell them that because of the penalty, they are in 8th place and have not been eliminated. Mark and Bill, on the other hand, are eliminated.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Amazing Race Week 2
This was actually a good episode for getting to know the contestants. Starting out, we get to see Terence and Sarah, the "newly and probably short-termed" dating couple at the pit stop, Camp Travelocity. Terence (and, dude, you need a nickname) is just a weirdo. He's obsessed with Sarah talking to anyone else. DING DING DING, I can hear the female alarm bells going off all over the country.
Brother and Sister Nick and Starr leave the Pit first at 4:00 am, and they have to fly to Brazil. One by one the teams depart for the airport. Nick and Starr and the Cheaters figure out that there is a plane leaving at 6:45 am but it has only one seat. SOMEHOW, the plane suddenly gets changed to a bigger plane (and, when the hell does that happen in the US???). Tina (Cheater Wife) of course takes credit for it and has to tell EVERYONE that she got them a bigger plane so they better pucker up. The plane has no assigned seating but Tina is assured from the check in lady that she will get a front row seat. Instead of getting in line, Tina walks around to everyone repeating her, "I got us a bigger plane" story. Of course, everyone else lines up to get on the plane. The Cheaters start a huge fight that since TINA GAVE BIRTH TO THE BIGGER PLANE, it's only fair they get the best seats. Anyone hear the hand of fate winding up?
OH, I forgot to mention that Terence bumped his head getting to the airport and is now neurotically nursing a head wound. Sarah, just get the hell out of that relationship.
Once in Brazil, they have to take taxi's to the Plaza do Cumbuco. The Cheaters and others at the front of the plane blindly run around looking for taxi's while the last teams off the plane figure the right way out quicker. Anthony and Stephanie get a bad cab. Ok, I gotta bag on these 2. They are not young and have been dating for a while but Anthony won't commit unless they win the Amazing Race and can afford to marry. haha. I think he's said this enough times over the years that Stephanie called his bluff and got them on the show. He wants them to be financially secure before they marry, although he's a mortgage broker (good luck with that these days) and she's a financial salesperson. Anyway, their cab has issues and Anthony gets out to slooooooowly push it. You think he really want to win and get married?
At Plaza do Cumbuco, teams are instructed to take dune buggies to the Barraca D Manuel where they get their next clues: Detour. Teams have to chose between Beach It, which means moving a boat into the water, or Docket, which is finding a clue in a storage container in a huge lot of storage containers.
Mark and Bill go the docket route. Ok, there 2 are hilarious. From their bios: "Mark and Bill, friends for over 23 years, first met at a science fiction club and have been bonding over their love for comics and games ever since" At one point when they find the clue they actually do, what I believe to be, an impersonation of Yoda.
Terence and Sarah finish the boat thing first but walk right by the taxi stand, and spend a while screaming at each other looking for a cab. The other teams, one by one, drive by. Finally, Mom and Son stop and tell them where to go.
The Blonde Divorcees, Kelly and Christie live up to their haircolor as they finish the boat thing but then begin to crazily dig in the sand looking for the container-um, the one mentioned in THE OTHER DETOUR. After watching 6 other teams finish the boat thing and then run for the taxi's, they give up the search and go to the cabs. There they re-read the clue and figure out there never was any container.
After the detour, teams head to Parque de Vaquejada and get a Roadblock. A Roadblock is a task that only one person can do. Just had to get that in. So, this is the weirdest roadblock and somehow something in the instructions are missing. They have a long wall with Brazilian words and places on it and somehow the contestants have to find their next destination. With no rhyme or reason, the contestants finally just write down everything and read the list one by one to the painter dude who gives them their next clue, leading to the Pit stop.
Ken and Bill and The Cheaters finish first and race to the mat. Cheaters are first to arrive and win a pair of ATV's. And, since there are 2 of them, they will be easy to divide in the final divorce.
Christy and Kelly again fail to read the clue and don't tell their taxi driver to wait. They finish but have to wonder around for a while looking for a cab.
All the other teams make it to the Pit, and it finally comes down to Anthony and Stephanie, who are eliminated and won't be getting hitched any time soon.
Brother and Sister Nick and Starr leave the Pit first at 4:00 am, and they have to fly to Brazil. One by one the teams depart for the airport. Nick and Starr and the Cheaters figure out that there is a plane leaving at 6:45 am but it has only one seat. SOMEHOW, the plane suddenly gets changed to a bigger plane (and, when the hell does that happen in the US???). Tina (Cheater Wife) of course takes credit for it and has to tell EVERYONE that she got them a bigger plane so they better pucker up. The plane has no assigned seating but Tina is assured from the check in lady that she will get a front row seat. Instead of getting in line, Tina walks around to everyone repeating her, "I got us a bigger plane" story. Of course, everyone else lines up to get on the plane. The Cheaters start a huge fight that since TINA GAVE BIRTH TO THE BIGGER PLANE, it's only fair they get the best seats. Anyone hear the hand of fate winding up?
OH, I forgot to mention that Terence bumped his head getting to the airport and is now neurotically nursing a head wound. Sarah, just get the hell out of that relationship.
Once in Brazil, they have to take taxi's to the Plaza do Cumbuco. The Cheaters and others at the front of the plane blindly run around looking for taxi's while the last teams off the plane figure the right way out quicker. Anthony and Stephanie get a bad cab. Ok, I gotta bag on these 2. They are not young and have been dating for a while but Anthony won't commit unless they win the Amazing Race and can afford to marry. haha. I think he's said this enough times over the years that Stephanie called his bluff and got them on the show. He wants them to be financially secure before they marry, although he's a mortgage broker (good luck with that these days) and she's a financial salesperson. Anyway, their cab has issues and Anthony gets out to slooooooowly push it. You think he really want to win and get married?
At Plaza do Cumbuco, teams are instructed to take dune buggies to the Barraca D Manuel where they get their next clues: Detour. Teams have to chose between Beach It, which means moving a boat into the water, or Docket, which is finding a clue in a storage container in a huge lot of storage containers.
Mark and Bill go the docket route. Ok, there 2 are hilarious. From their bios: "Mark and Bill, friends for over 23 years, first met at a science fiction club and have been bonding over their love for comics and games ever since" At one point when they find the clue they actually do, what I believe to be, an impersonation of Yoda.
Terence and Sarah finish the boat thing first but walk right by the taxi stand, and spend a while screaming at each other looking for a cab. The other teams, one by one, drive by. Finally, Mom and Son stop and tell them where to go.
The Blonde Divorcees, Kelly and Christie live up to their haircolor as they finish the boat thing but then begin to crazily dig in the sand looking for the container-um, the one mentioned in THE OTHER DETOUR. After watching 6 other teams finish the boat thing and then run for the taxi's, they give up the search and go to the cabs. There they re-read the clue and figure out there never was any container.
After the detour, teams head to Parque de Vaquejada and get a Roadblock. A Roadblock is a task that only one person can do. Just had to get that in. So, this is the weirdest roadblock and somehow something in the instructions are missing. They have a long wall with Brazilian words and places on it and somehow the contestants have to find their next destination. With no rhyme or reason, the contestants finally just write down everything and read the list one by one to the painter dude who gives them their next clue, leading to the Pit stop.
Ken and Bill and The Cheaters finish first and race to the mat. Cheaters are first to arrive and win a pair of ATV's. And, since there are 2 of them, they will be easy to divide in the final divorce.
Christy and Kelly again fail to read the clue and don't tell their taxi driver to wait. They finish but have to wonder around for a while looking for a cab.
All the other teams make it to the Pit, and it finally comes down to Anthony and Stephanie, who are eliminated and won't be getting hitched any time soon.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Amazing Race Week 1
Ding...fries are done. Gotta get this update out before tonight's show. The first one is always the hardest when you don't know the teams yet.
Season 13 of the Amazing Race kicked off from LA, and might I say that Travelocity must be raking it in since they took off in Mercedes. Teams took off driving to the airport to get a flight to Salvador Brazil. Anyone else wonder how the hippies ("beekeepers") were going to get through airport security with all of their drugs? Although I'm not sure LAX is equipped with beard-sniffing dogs.
On the drive to the airport we get to learn a few things about the contestants: Ken and Tina are separated Christians, 'cause he shagged outside of marriage, Toni is a single mom to Dallas and newly dating Terence and Sarah aren't going to be together at the end of the 11 legs.
Either I never noticed it last time, or this is the first time they had a marked ticket counter for the Amazing Race. Even the clue apparently said, "go to the MARKED counter", although a couple of teams missed out on that and stood in the terrorist line. Aja and Ty finally figured it out and set off a stampede to the correct counter. I can see why American is not a sponsor, since AS USUAL the American flight had an hour and a half delay. While waiting, Nick and Starr approached the Cheaters (my team, Ken and Tina) to form a loose alliance.
On the American flight: Mark & Bill, Ken & Tina, Nick and Starr, Terence & Sarah, Aja & Ty, and Kelly & Christy. On United: Andrew & Dan, Toni & Dallas, Anthony & Stephanie, Marisa & Brooke, and Anita & Arthur.
Once in Brazil teams have to take a taxi to a sandwich shop, "O Rei Do Pernil" where they have to take a coffee cart through the streets of Brazil and up the funicular to get their next clue leading them to a military base for a night spent under mosquito nets and a sign up sheet for one of 3 departure times. 9 am departures for Terence & Sarah, Mark & Bill, Nick & Starr, and The Cheaters. 9:30 departures for Aja & Ty Kelly & Christy and the fastest couple from the United flight, frat boys Andrew & Dan. 9:45 for Marisa & Brooke, Anthony & Stephanie, Toni & Dallas, and Anita & Arthur.
In the morning teams had to get cabs and go to a church for their next clue: DETOUR. And, once again, thanks to Phil for reminding us all after 13 seasons what a detour is. Detour is hard way up or soft way down, which I thought was not helpful for the Cheaters who are trying to forget that little marriage detour. All but the frat boys, chose soft way down and had to climb down a cargo net. I believe the frat boys felt that their 4 years of experience doing pub crawls would help them with the task at hand.
After completing the Detour, teams were instructed to go to the Pit Stop at Forte Sao Marcelo. The Cheaters and Nick and Starr got down the cargo net first but the Cheaters jumped in a taxi rather than ask for directions. Nick and Starr found out they needed to take a close ferry and they managed to get the first boat for a first place finish. Frat boys crawled up the steps to the most annoying example of Brazilian street music, only to be asked how many steps did you just climb up. LOL. Duh, let's go back and count this time.
At the end, the hippies who were forced to leave their speed behind were eliminated. Which is a shame because we didn't really get to know how freaky they really were. I don't know about anyone else but one look at all that grey hair and I didn't even want to know what the drain in their shower looks like.
Season 13 of the Amazing Race kicked off from LA, and might I say that Travelocity must be raking it in since they took off in Mercedes. Teams took off driving to the airport to get a flight to Salvador Brazil. Anyone else wonder how the hippies ("beekeepers") were going to get through airport security with all of their drugs? Although I'm not sure LAX is equipped with beard-sniffing dogs.
On the drive to the airport we get to learn a few things about the contestants: Ken and Tina are separated Christians, 'cause he shagged outside of marriage, Toni is a single mom to Dallas and newly dating Terence and Sarah aren't going to be together at the end of the 11 legs.
Either I never noticed it last time, or this is the first time they had a marked ticket counter for the Amazing Race. Even the clue apparently said, "go to the MARKED counter", although a couple of teams missed out on that and stood in the terrorist line. Aja and Ty finally figured it out and set off a stampede to the correct counter. I can see why American is not a sponsor, since AS USUAL the American flight had an hour and a half delay. While waiting, Nick and Starr approached the Cheaters (my team, Ken and Tina) to form a loose alliance.
On the American flight: Mark & Bill, Ken & Tina, Nick and Starr, Terence & Sarah, Aja & Ty, and Kelly & Christy. On United: Andrew & Dan, Toni & Dallas, Anthony & Stephanie, Marisa & Brooke, and Anita & Arthur.
Once in Brazil teams have to take a taxi to a sandwich shop, "O Rei Do Pernil" where they have to take a coffee cart through the streets of Brazil and up the funicular to get their next clue leading them to a military base for a night spent under mosquito nets and a sign up sheet for one of 3 departure times. 9 am departures for Terence & Sarah, Mark & Bill, Nick & Starr, and The Cheaters. 9:30 departures for Aja & Ty Kelly & Christy and the fastest couple from the United flight, frat boys Andrew & Dan. 9:45 for Marisa & Brooke, Anthony & Stephanie, Toni & Dallas, and Anita & Arthur.
In the morning teams had to get cabs and go to a church for their next clue: DETOUR. And, once again, thanks to Phil for reminding us all after 13 seasons what a detour is. Detour is hard way up or soft way down, which I thought was not helpful for the Cheaters who are trying to forget that little marriage detour. All but the frat boys, chose soft way down and had to climb down a cargo net. I believe the frat boys felt that their 4 years of experience doing pub crawls would help them with the task at hand.
After completing the Detour, teams were instructed to go to the Pit Stop at Forte Sao Marcelo. The Cheaters and Nick and Starr got down the cargo net first but the Cheaters jumped in a taxi rather than ask for directions. Nick and Starr found out they needed to take a close ferry and they managed to get the first boat for a first place finish. Frat boys crawled up the steps to the most annoying example of Brazilian street music, only to be asked how many steps did you just climb up. LOL. Duh, let's go back and count this time.
At the end, the hippies who were forced to leave their speed behind were eliminated. Which is a shame because we didn't really get to know how freaky they really were. I don't know about anyone else but one look at all that grey hair and I didn't even want to know what the drain in their shower looks like.
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