Another Survivor Comes to a Close

WOW.  I can't believe we're almost at the end.  Good season, I think.  I'll be sending out a message to those who I think owe me moola a little bit later today.

Last time was a double elimination night with Reynolds of course going but a blindside of Andrea-with an immunity idol in her pocket!  So tonight's definitely Eddie, right??

Eddie: "man, all the chicks I go out with end up going home".  Yea, touch of death, Eddie.  He found lurve how many times in a 35 day period??  He and Cochran are sitting around talking.  "So, Eddie, if you get immunity who do you think is going home? "  "Oh, you are, Cochran".  WHAT??  Here he thought everyone pictured him as a skinny weak non threat instead of the mastermind with a PhD in Survivor. 

Dawn: I have 2 ways to go.  Either join Sherri and Cochran or Brenda and Erik for final 3.  Then she cries about it.

Erik is starving and frankly losing his marbles.  He decides a coconut is mocking him and wants to climb a huge tree to get it.  About halfway up he realizes he could fall and be out of Survivor yet again, so he comes down. 

Tree Mail, brought to you by SPRINT (ding).  It's videos of the loved ones who are obviously on the island.  So it's the family member challenge.

Brenda's Dad is there-and their reunion gets Jeff all choked up for the first time in 26 seasons.  Uhuh.  It's either Low T Jeff or that crappy Oprah light show you host. 
Erik's brother, Sherri's husband-and is it me or is she a cougar??  Cochran's cute mom-"sorry I smell, Mom".  Eddie's Big Dad and finally Dawn's husband.  She cries.

Wanna know what you're playing for?  A backyard BBQ set up right off of your beach.  Challenge is to spin around and around to unscrew a rail, hang it on a rack and they play toss the bolos onto the rails. 

Cochran and his mom are totally out of this one.  He starts to make small talk about her flight over. 

Brenda and her Dad win immunity!  And Jeff tells her to pick one other person.  She picks Dawn, who cries. 

BUT WAIT, there's a twist never before seen in Survivor.  Brenda gets another SPRINT phone (ding ding) with a picture of a second loved one for everyone.  The twist is she can pick another survivor to get to see their 2 loved ones and BBQ OR she can give it up for Dawn and herself and give the other 4 the chance to see loved ones.  Dawn is crying.  Brenda OF COURSE gives it up. 

So the 4 of them and their loved ones have a great BBQ.  Everyone is meeting and greeting and Erik and his brothers just sit down to chow.  Cochran talks about being 13 years old and watching the first episode with his Mom (I watched it too) and everyone since and now getting to share this with her.  But then he starts mocking his Dad who is in sunglasses and manning the grill-"Dad's acting all hollywood.  Since when are we BBQing DAD???  LOL.

Back at camp Dawn is just flat out losing it.  "Brenda is going to get good will, and they all get their loved ones and I get nothing.  She's crying and really really pissed OFF. 

Later Cochran admits that likeability is a double edged sword...

Challenge:  It's a hang over the water while Jeff lowers them with a winch challenge. And frankly I hope they have had tetanus shots because everything looks all rusty to me.  Eddie knows that if he loses he's gone. 

He and Cochran and the first 2 to go!  And everyone is smiling.  Sherri is also out and it's down to Dawn and Brenda.  Dawn tries to make a deal with Brenda since she's never won immunity, and since Eddie's already lost but Brenda shuts it down.  Dawn "I just don't want to do this for hours".  Dawn wins immunity.  And cries.  Brenda: "Gotta keep paranoid Dawn happy". 

Sooooo, it's Eddie, right??

Cochran really wants Brenda to go.  He kinda hints that he wants a different outcome than Eddie to Sherri, and she's like "so if you're thinking Brenda in a blindside I'm totally for it".  He and Dawn talk about whether it's a bigger threat to let Eddie get any farther in the game (I THINK IT IS), or if it's more dangerous to keep Brenda in given she is a challenge winner and everyone loves her. 

Tribal, and Mr Low T is in Dark Blue.

Dawn, you have immunity!  Yep, it feels good, it was on my bucket list.
Brenda: It was OK that I lost because I lost to Dawn.
Eddie, so is your luck about to run out tonight?  Probably Jeff, which is OK because I want a couple nights to shag Andrea before I go home to my other 4 girlfriends.
Dawn" Does a gesture like Brenda made buy her anything?  Yep
Sherri: Yep it does.
Cochran: Eddie is an easy vote, but is it a smart vote??
Eddie: ha ha, I'm toast Jeff.

Vote.  Eddie gets 2 votes, Erik gets one and Brenda is the last person blindsided! 

She's pretty upset.  "I was honest with you guys!!  It hurts".  Eddie just sits there looking stupid again.

May the best person (DAWN) win!!!

Survivor Update With a Poop Rant

I feel like I haven't bagged on Sherri enough, so with that in mind I googled her because I couldn't stand seeing she was a "fast food franchise" owner.  Apparently she owns a couple Wentz Pretzels (??), a couple of Jimmy Johns, a Cinnabon and a Haagen Das. I seriously can't stand her, and I believe she has permanently dyed eyelashes, or tattoo'd eyeliner.  Ya know what else I found out?  She named her son after Colby Donaldson.  Her plan going into the game was to flirt.  Uhuh.  How's that working out for ya??

Ok.  I feel better.  So last time we spoke, Phillip was voted off.  And this week everyone in Stealth R Us apparently has the sads about it.  Brenda has a little melt down and Dawn tells her to keep drinking the brownish water.  They are apparently all hungry and low on food.  Is it me or have they already gone through about 10 giant bags of rice and beans?? 

Aaaand, it's the required auction day.  Malcolm swears he isn't buying ANY food.  Just holding off for the "advantage" clue.  Which is funny because Malcolm buys the first thing Jeff puts up.  $20 for 3 beers and nuts.  A better deal than at Citizen's Park!  Reynolds spends $180 for a covered item, and then is given the choice to trade for one of 2 other covered items.  He sticks with the original one and gets a single slice of pizza.  Sherri blows her entire $500 on the rest of the pizza. 

Dawn spends $500 on a chicken.  Malcolm spends his remaining $480 on the information clue.  It's directions to a buried immunity idol.  Andrea and Brenda bid up the next item, pissing Brenda off.  Andrea gets spaghetti, garlic bread and wine BUT she also gets a chance to give that up and get...yet more bags of beans and rice.  She takes the beans and rice. 

$340 from Cochran for an advantage at the next immunity challenge.  Brenda finally gives in and buys a covered item for $300 and gets a pig brain.  I think she does eat it.  $20 to everyone for letters from home.  Sherri, Dawn and Malcolm can't buy them.  And finally, Eddie spends $200 for a giant bowl of peanut butter he can share for 60 seconds, and they all get to keep anything smeared on their bodies.  Sherri feeds Cochran peanut butter from her fingers. Jeff: "how often does that happen?"  Cochran: "More often than you think, Jeff".  LOL

OK, time for my hygiene rant.  I cannot believe everyone dipped into that bowl of peanut butter and spread it on their dirty bodies and then ate it. Seriously I'm still disgusted.  There must be Purrell bottles behind all of the fake trees in the jungle because there is no way you cold go 39 days without washing your hands and not comes down with a nasty E. Coli infection.  And you never see where they poop.  Do they all poop in the same place or what?  In all the seasons I have never heard anyone talk about digging a latrine.  Why is that?  BECAUSE THERE ARE PROBABLY PORTA POTTIES AROUND THE BEND.  Seriously, no one steps in someone else's poop?  Do they poop in the water when they're out there?  Wouldn't the poop float back on to the beach and someone would say, "yo, your poop floated in, go pick it up".  I swear there is a conspiracy of poop silence.  Like the Survivors have to sign a contract that says they can never discuss pooping. And why do the women never get nasty yeast infections?  I mean come ON, 39 days in a wet bathing suit??  Seriously, if they gave then flour they could probably make bread.  Yet you never see anyone scratching their privates all day long.  Yep.  There are probably wipes hiding under the rocks. 

So where was I?  Oh yea, the auction is concluded.  Wrap and the boys decide to work on getting Sherri to vote with them. 

Malcolm spends the night digging all around the tree he's sure has the idol.  Andrea comes upon him and just sits and watches him.  It's a stand off. 

Immunity Challenge:  Hold a rope with a log attached to it that weighs 1/3 or your original body weight.  Every 5 minutes move your hand down the rope knots until you run out.  Cochran gets to move his hands back up 2 knots whenever he chooses.  He chooses wisely to do it as soon as they move to the 3rd knot, so the entire time he's holding less weight.  It comes down to Cochran, Eddie and Wrap.  Cochran continues to be the challenge monster and wins immunity!!

Malcolm works on Sherri, Wrap on Erik.  Dawn works on Erik.  Question: should they split the vote or should they just all go in on one person?  Is Erik loyal??  Sherri tells the camera that she now calls the shots. 

Tribal:

Wrap-yes Jeff, the last tribal council changed things.  I don't think it's still 6-3.
Andrea: anyone flipping now will be voted out next.
Sherri-of course if you're at the bottom of the 6...
Dawn: Sherri, I hope you don't really think you're at the bottom of the 6.
Malcolm: it was a crazy day looking for that idol
Jeff: why all the talk about idols this season??
Dawn: Um, probably because they are getting played over and over this season, Jeff.
Erik: Yes I am concerned someone could flip. 
Cochran goes through the whole scenario and says "it only takes one person to change things"
Sherri just sits there looking like the cat who got the cream. 

Vote.  No Idol played.  The vote is split between Wrap, Malcolm and Andrea.  Second vote it's all Malcolm. 

I wonder what was worse, getting voted off or having to go to Ponderosa right after blindsiding Phillip???