Survivor Update Week 7

Yo, Day 16 and some of these girls are getting kind of mangy looking. Like, a couple of them have the dreaded "thighs don't touch at the top of the leg" disease. Nasty. What man is going to for that look?

Galout is without their leader, GoodRussell. The men do the math and figure out they would be better off with Shamwow on their side. They rig a vote for a new leader, and before the girls can figure out what happened, Shamwow is chosen as the new leader. She gives a really heartwarming speech, about the military, apple pie and not making 90210 get up before 9am. The boys are happy but Dave says, "Shamwow is so dim, she could still screw it up."

Over of F2, Etroll is all happy cause 5 people is almost the same as 8...

Challenge: It's a memory game. 13 pairs of matching items are on little tables with cute little straw hats on them. Teams have to match the items, uncovering 2 at a time. You either get to keep the item or you get a point. Etroll goes, John, Jaison and then Laura gets the first match which is a Romco Fire Starter Kit, wrapped in a tarp. Galout keeps the item. The keep going along. and it's so friggin boring even Survivor has to speed it up. Etroll is getting all confused. End of the day, Galout wins reward, a sail and lunch. Shamwow sends Laura to F2.

Cut to Kelly for the best line of the season: "It's like Sham was raised in a trailor park, married the rich guy in town and is now driving around in a jaguar". Hmmmm, which of course makes me thing Kelly was raised in a trailor park and has a little bit of experience with jealousy.

On F2, everyone is all friendly to Laura. Etroll invites her into his web, I mean to go get crabs (god, I was really scared for a minute here). Laura says to him, "so you have twins" , which is the first I have heard it. Etroll goes on to tell her his daddy is a minister and, GOSH Laura is a theology student, although she doesn't believe in "women being ministers". She does apparently believe in lady ministers walking around half naked on cbs. Etroll offers her an alliance when the two tribes join, cause they are both "good christians". He also lies to her about Ben finding and then hiding the idol, just like any good christian would do.

Galout goes off to their reward, and OMFG, it's the ship from Pirate Master, Jesus, please tell me no one is gonna be put on the black spot today and have to prove why they should not walk the lame ass plank. They get beef stew, bread and, according to Dave who I SWEAR is light in the loafers, "some really lovely scones".

On F2, Liz is trying to look busy but has to listen to Laura and Natalie discuss inspirational christian literature. Liz doesn't like the spiritual book of the month club and tells Etroll all about it.

Immunity Challenge: Jeff is in blue of course but his pants either got wet or he has a bladder condition. Hmmmm. Don't know if I could go with a man who wears depends, no matter how cute the dimples. Paddle out in the water, "fish" for wooden fish (dude, is this like a Child Learning Center game??) and then, wait for it, DO A PUZZLE.

Ok, so first of all F2 has no leadership necklace on, and Jeff asks about it cause his mom gets paid $50K a season to craft this shit up. They left it back at the tribe because they think it has bad juju. Then the fish are in such shallow water that both teams just walk their boats out to them instead of paddling. Lame ass. F2 gets all of their "fish" first and paddle in. Galout is following behind but kicking ass on the paddling. Jaison basically gives up.

It's rainbow fish! And, oh how FRIGGIN cute, their tails form a little pattern. Dave must be wetting himself. Galout wins immunity AGAIN. This time under Shamwow's steady leadership.

Back on F2, Etroll's giddy happy spirit of the morning has left him. "These idiots are gonna cost me $1 million." He wants Jaison gone, until Liz wants Jaison gone, then he apparently changes his mind. Liz is feeling pretty safe,

Tribal, Jeff is in medium blue.

Jeff: you have lost 8 out of 10 challenges making you the worst overall team in Survivor history (which I disagree with cause wasn't there a tribe that went down to 2 members before a merge??).

Natalie: no use getting negative Jeff
Etroll: "Do you still wake up thinking today's the day"? Oh yea, Jeff, we're just waiting for the merge to start kicking ass
Liz: "Do you trust these aholes?" Of course Jeff, cause I am one of them
Mick: "You stupid too?" Oh yes, Jeff, I loves me my team
Etroll;" Is it hard to vote someone off if you are all so tight?" Oh yes, Jeff, we're very tight. And we're gonna be an tighter 4.
Jaison: "Wassup? You look like you think these people are aholes" Why yes, Jeff, I secretely cannot stand these aholes, and in fact,I lame assed it in the challenge hoping they would vote me out of this hell.

Time to vote. Liz is out. SURPRISE!!



F2
Jaison Kim
Mick Wendy
Russell Donna
Natalie Carolyn

Galout
Brett Pam
Dave Amy
Erik Terri
John Joanne
Kelly Kevin and Matt
Laura Kelly
Monica Stacey
Shamwow Jeff and Eileen


Gone:
Marisa Ginnie
Mike Karen and John
Betsy Becky and Mary
Ben Nancy D
Yasmin Elayne
Ashley Tess
Russell S Lori
Elizabeth Leslie