It's time for an early oh so upsetting to alliances DROP YOUR BUFFS event. And the 2 tribes shall become 3 with the new tribe starting out "from scratch with nothing". Um, it's what, day 4?This goes to show how much freaking STUFF today's Survivor kids are given. So, here's the new line up:
On the old Orange tribe: JT, angry Michaela, da Queen Sandra, Varner, Malcolm and tryin-to-hard Aubry. JT is basically the odd man out as the only one remaining orange.
On Blue: We have Caleb, Tai, Brad and Haley, secret agent Debbie and the blonde Sierra. Caleb and Haley are out of numbers.
The new tribe, Green (yea I know they all have real tribe names but I'll bet none of you know them either): Troyzan, Ciri, Zeke, Sarah, Ozzy and Andrea. Troy is the odd man out, and Ozzy and Ciri are once again tethered at the neck.
They return to their new beaches and Malcolm is blown away by the luxury at the Orange tribe's digs. They have chickens, tools and have even hung Pier 1 Import shit from the trees to decorate. Yes, Malcolm, you youngins are totally spoiled. Ask
Australia season Jeff Varner about it. Malcolm says it's like being at a SPA.
JT realizes he's pretty screwed and it's time to scramble. He takes everyone out on their ChrisCraft boat to go fishing with all their gear, making sure they are waaaaay out. He then engineers a reason to go back to camp to get a wrench, leaving the former blue tribe adrift without any way to like, oh I don't know, FREAKING PADDLE BACK TO CAMP. JT runs around looking for an idol long enough that even Varner knows he's out looking for an idol. They decide he's dangerous, but agree they have the numbers. Then they open another bottle of veuve cliquot rose, NOT CHILLED PROPERLY, because "roughing it".
On the new Orange, Hali and Caleb are on the bottom. Brad and Tai apparently have a relationship so Brad talks to Tai about who to get rid of. They discuss Caleb and Debbie.
NOTE: Can anyone tell me what BIG MOVE Tai ever was a part of? Because he always seems to be the most clueless scrambler to me.
Anyway, Tai wants Caleb to stay. Shit, Tai wants everyone to stay and he wants them all to form a new family and live out their days as best friends with chickens (BFWC).
On the Green tribe, Troy is the odd man out. Ciri and Ozzy talk and agree they are safe now. Ciri is really trying to calm the inner bitch and cultivate a healthy relationship with Ozzy.
Troy is standing near a silent Andrea and asks her, do I have the plague? She's all "oh hey, didn't see or smell you standing there". He thinks she's a little devil but not nearly as clever as she thinks. And normally I'd be upset about that kind of sexist talk but, hell, he's right.
Troy decides to go idol looking, while the rest of the tribe discusses how he wouldn't have the balls to look too long for an idol, what him being odd man out and they having constant surveillance. He finds a message in a bottle on the beach, and it's fortunately not a Nicholas Sparks novel. It's a clue for an idol hidden at the challenge which he has to be BOLD to grab.
Da Queen wants to eat a goat. There are a few of them "wandering" around this camp, and by wandering around I mean being periodically released by the producers for goat shots. JT, trying to save his ass, says he can catch a goat. He doesn't want to eat goat but whatever keeps da queen happy. He catches a little baby goat, and then they catch the momma goat. Sandra all but chomps into the baby goat still alive. Nobody wants to kill the baby and momma goat, except Sandra who would kill any of the other survivors if she thought it would get her another 12 hours closer to another freaking million dollars. Anyone else curious what tacky shit she blew the first 2 on??? Probably a trailer version of Mar-A-Logo.
JT says, I can't eat the baby/momma goats. Shall we try for a male? Malcolm says this is how Sandra is in real life. She doesn't give a damn about anyone else. Michaela suggests they could just eat chicken, the other white meat, instead. PETA crisis averted as Sandra releases her death grip on the baby goat she named Filet and they decide not to eat goat.
Challenge. Oh lord, how many freaking parts is this one gonna have before we get to the puzzle??? 3 people are tied together and have to do some obstacles, then an over/under thing, then until and carry buckets over these giant net teeter-totter things to fill up another bucket and open a gate and then somehow dig? (I was getting lost already) and get puzzle pieces and another couple of people will do big board puzzles of, you guessed it, the logo.
Wanna know? MORE LUXURY ITEMS!!! Playing for a tarp and a choice of body comfort or tastebud comfort. Second team gets the other luxury item.
Blue wins first place and then Green gets second, In the celebration Troy gets himself on the other side of the board and grabs the idol.
Orange has to send somebody home. Debbie declares they are rock solid and will be sending either Caleb or Hali home. Debbie and Sierra discuss how Tai and Caleb are dangerous together. Debbie still thinks they are strong but Sierra tells her she'd be a fool to discount that relationship.
Brad wants Tai to decide on Caleb, so he talks to him about how merging with Tai and Caleb together is dangerous for Tai because people will assume you are together. Tai says it makes sense but.....
Tribal-Jeff gets to do his fire is your life shit 3 times, which is probably the reason for the split.
Debbie says something about everyone assuming Tai and Caleb have a link, and Caleb rebuts that this time he's from a different tribe.
Sierra says it's a huge concern for her, that history (even though he left on day 9 last season). She says she and Hali had no relationship,
Hali says Caleb has more angles to work the group then she does. It's pointed out that Hali is a law student, who happens to get lots of free time to play survivor, and this is one of her closing arguments.
Caleb says the choice is stronger and better for challenges him or manipulated easy vote Hali
Hali says, see? That kind of statement is why he is a threat.
Brad says, something. LOL
Tai says something in another language about looking at loyalty, trust and the long picture.
Caleb again says he's an asset and she has relationships on the other tribe.
Hali ends her rebuttal with "and I like long walks on the beach, sunsets and am open to new relationships".
Survivor
Time to vote.......and it's Caleb.
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