So, let me just
apologize for not commenting yet this season on HOW MUCH TONY LOOKS
LIKE A FRIGGIN MONKEY FACE. Seriously, are you sitting there every
Wednesday discussing amongst yourselves how I could be over looking
this? HOLY SHIT. I just looked at the TV and said, HE'S A MONKEY
FACE.
Ok, last week Jefra stayed with her alliance and male model Jeremiah was
sent packing. Spencer used his idol to protect himself instead of
giving it to Jeremiah, and Kass has to rub it in his face. She is kind
of a bitch. Says of course he wouldn't give it up he's the most selfish
of the species, a college age boy. Hmmmm, me thinks someone didn't get
invited to the Senior Dance in college!
It's Survivor Auction day. And, it's also time for me to rant. The
trouble with this show is it has become predictable. Everyone knows
there is going to be an 'advantage" for sale. This time, it meant the
food was a buyers market with Tony, Tasha and Spencer sitting out
bidding and waiting for the advantage. Tony is such a (monkeyfaced)
paranoid bastard that even with the special GAME RUINING idol he still
can't handle the thought of someone else getting a slight edge. Trish,
on the other hand, is either feeling really safe or is totally clueless
as to strategy. She is HUNGRY. She buys the first item-popcorn, candy
and soda- for $80. OMG, IT'S A GUMMY BEAR!!! My prediction is at the
after show she is going to weigh about 220. That girl is going to come
off the island like a hoover vacuum cleaner.
Jefra buys the next mystery package and gets quesadillas, quac and a
margarita for $100. For $20 Kass gets the choice of 2 covered trays,
The one she takes has a steak sandwich and ice tea. At this point Trish
is all "why aren't you people eating???" "Cheapo Deapo's". Trish buys
the tray Kass gave up for $60 and gets rice and water. LOL. Ribs and
beer go for $40 to Woo who describes them in their entirety.
Jeff asks Tony, Spencer and Tasha what they are waiting for. They want
an advantage, Jeff. Ok, so lets got to it. Tony yells out $500.
Nope. If it reaches the maximum, then anyone who has the money and
wants in can pay $500 for a chance to draw rocks. Tony and Spencer are
in but FOR WHATEVER REASON, Tasha doesn't. Idiot. It would have
increased the odds that she and Spencer would have gotten it. Big
surprise, Tony gets the advantage and the auction is ended.
Dear Mark Burnett/Jeff Probst. PLEASE STOP SELLING AN ADVANTAGE AS
AN ADVANTAGE. If you want to include an advantage in the auction, might
I suggest you mention that one of the items up for sale might include
an additional advantage? That way, more people would bid the food stuff
up. Either that or totally skip the advantage next time around and
totally screw people over who wait for it and get neither an advantage
or food.
Spencer is miserable and Kass is loving it. Tony is pissed off that
people bought food and ate. He's also annoyed by the girls sitting
around discussing what they ate. So he wonders off, reads the advantage
and yawn, it's a clue to the immunity idol.
The girls are in the water rinsing out their cooches, and Tasha makes
sure Tony sees her right in the mix. She wants to make him paranoid.
Tony doesn't disappoint. He sees them all talking and starts wigging
out, complaining to Spencer about it. Spencer, who really is playing a
great game, asks Tony if he's worried? He proceeds to tell him how
Jefra wanted to blindside him, and how she was saying she could get
Trish to flip as well. Spencer knows Tony is crazy and could easily be
pushed.
A little later on, the girls and Spencer are in the water and Tony is
pissed off. There's a dying crab and Jefra tells him to hurry up and
cook it so it doesn't go bad. He's mumbles to his ever present sidekick
Woo "get your ass up here and cook!"
A little later, and for whatever reason it is accompanied by the
"suspenseful music", Tony finds another idol. He runs around showing it
to his alliance, supposedly because it's for "all of us", but mainly so
they don't try to flip and blindside him.
Challenge: Race to dig up 5 bags, each one with a ball in it to be used
in a table maze. Kass and Trish are totally lost digging for balls
(life imitates art, once again...) and as Jeff says "Tony goes crazy and
knocks his balls all over the place". It's a race between Woo and
Tasha, with Tasha once again winning immunity!
Tasha is still working Tony with her chattering to the woman. Tony
counts and figures out there are 4 women and 3 men. One of his
alliances is an all male one, since he thinks there might be the
beginnings of an all female alliance. He tells Spencer's theory and
that he wants Jefra to go. He talks to Woo, who is like, cool dude.
Tony wants Spencer to get Tasha in on it, and of course she's fine. He
chooses not to tell Trish or Kass the plan.
Spencer doesn't totally trust Tony, so he goes searching for the idol,
which makes Tonymonkeyface mad. He tells Woo "there's going to be chaos
tonight!"
Tribal
Spencer-yes, Jeff, one would think I was in trouble tonight.
Tony-IT'S CHAOTIC OUT THERE!! Spencer tried to make me think Jefra was
against me. He pulls out his idol and puts it on. "I'm not going
anywhere tonight"
Jefra-I was upset about LJ
Trish-she was upset that you didn't TELL her about LJ
Tony-you don't advertise a blindside dumbass. All they have left is a belief in our alliance.
Spencer-chaos is great! If I can mix things up it only helps me.
Kass-someone could very well make a mistake tonight.
Spencer-I've played well and hard but I'm not ready to go. There are
windows of opportunity that open and close fast. Not making a move when
the opportunity arises is why most people lost the game.
Jeff: sniff sniff, you said that way better than I ever did and I've had like 20 seasons of trying. Let's vote.
It's 3 votes for Spencer and 4 votes for Jefra! Another blindside!!
Wednesday, May 7, 2014
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