It's day 5 and Gen x (who will be called X from here on in) hasn't started fire yet, even with a flint from the last tribal. Paul is all assholiness saying "haha, sure David, why don't you give it a try". And then David BRINGS IT and makes fire! Woohoo ya little man!!
David is basically the family joke child that no one is taking any notice of. So he goes off to find rocks to use as chairs and looks all around for an idol. He finds the first one, which is basically inside of a coconut with an ink marking on it. So there's that. Wonder if he will successfully use it or go home with at least something big in his pants.
Over on the Millennial tribe (which will now be referred to as M since I can't spell Millennials without the spellchecker riding my ass) it's love goggles. The prom king and queen, Taylor and Figgy are doing some snuggling in the group bed. And I am 100% TOTALLY AGREEING WITH MICHAELA: " You stink, your mouth is nasty, you have sand in your drawers AND IT'S NASTY.
Everyone is on to it and everyone has an excuse. "Millennials are dreamers"..."Nobody cares"...."Hookups are less serious" (this from Zeke who I can bet would think it was a big deal if he EVER hooked up). However the rest of the triforce is getting nervous. Jay thinks they are totally STUPID. He and Michelle think it could hurt their alliance. He tells Taylor that power couples don't last but Taylor isn't worried. The prom king can get away with a lot. Jay calls it a bullseye for a nuclear missile.
X Ken, who is Mr. Off the Grid, is fishing and catching a bit octopus. He has an affinity with David because he apparently had a speech impediment once and although not too shabby in the abs department, is apparently not great at the social game. Ken and David agree that it's all about Paul's posse and he needs to go. They form a bro alliance and David shows off his idol as proof of trust.
The M'ers are finding it difficult to actually live outside of their many screens and in reality. It's haaaaard! Taylor wants to make a surfboard. Michaela and Figgy go at it for a bit. Michaela thinks figgy is dumb. Adam thinks Michaela needs to chill and stop the cat fighting.
X: Paul wants to be in total control. CeCe talks with Ken and Dave and they agree that while they need to cut off the head, aka Paul, the best thing is to keep feeding his bloated ego until that time.
Paul collapses, they bring in the medic WHO IS NOT THE NORMAL AUSTRALIAN, but alas no heart attack. Just heat stroke, dehydration and a massive ego. Dave is a bit disappointed.
Challenge. It's in the water. Swim, race up a cargo net, jump off a platform and grab a key. Use the keys to unlock a swim mask, dive and untie rings to be used in the RING TOSS. During this challenge Jeff calls out everyone's name as we go through and I finally figure out who the other half of the tribes are. David of course is pathetically slow but manages to get a key leaving the Ms with a lead after the first part of the challenge. In the second part Marti takes forever with her ring and X makes up time. At the ring toss, CeCe and Ken kill it winning immunity and a tarp.
Paul announces that the ol pirate is back from the dead.
M: Zeke is all excited to get to VOTE PEOPLE OUT!!! Mari wants to blindside Figgy tonight, yet Will is afraid she will see it coming. Will btw is pretty smart for the youngest on the tribe.
Zeke and Adam tell Jay that Figgy is going. WHYYYYYYY???? Do they not get that he is in an alliance with them?? Jay tells Michelle who realized something has to happen. Says they need Michaela and Figgy to make up. Jay tells Figgy and Michaela that basically it's Figgy but Michaela is a close second. Figgy says they need to be 6 strong, but that they also need Will. They decide on Mari but Michelle has to pull some strings.
Tribal
OMG they are all gobsmacked to be at Tribal. It's beautiful.....It's like being inside my tv.....
Jeff asks Mari if social media makes Millennials better at the social game? She admits that in real life there is this thing called empathy and it's harder to screw people over when you can see their eyeballs.
Zeke tells Jeff that he's living the dream. "I'm my best version of myself and it makes me want to give 100%, unlike the usual 35% I give in my asset management job"
Michaela starts it up saying basically it also brings out the worst in some people. Adam interprets for Jeff that Michaela is a "straight shooter" that many times ends up with the gun pointed at herself. Michaela continues that there are little groups forming.
Hannah is totally star struck. She does manage to get out that there is some cuddling going on. She calls out Taylor and Figgy who try to play dumb, or are dumb. While Jeff is talking to Taylor and Figgy Michelle is working on Hannah telling her to vote for Mari and to trust her.
This keeps going on while Michaela kicks it up a few notches in her war with Figgy. Taylor says it's not that big of a deal and it's too early in the game for anyone to really care about his penis leading him around in an alliance with Figgy. Michaela says that she isn't stupid and she isn't buying that.
Michelle, Hannah and Jay are still all taking about voting for Mari. Michelle takes a breath and says if she were Figgy she would be scared.
Jeff asks Hannah a question and she goes all idiot, saying she's dizzy, he's Jeff Probst, it's all confusing....
Mari says Hannah has issues and is probably just talking about puppies or butts.
Time to vote! Hannah has another meltdown and takes forever to cast her vote.
In the end, Figgy gets 3 votes and Mari gets 6 and is back to playing video games on the plane home.
On her way out, Mari turns and says..."SALTY". LOL. I'm guessing I'm way too old to be cool!!
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