Tuesday, May 5, 2020

Survivor: Milk and Cookies

Welcome to the almost last Survivor update!  It appears we have a 2 hour episode tomorrow and the finale next week.  Seems like a lot of people still left hanging around, so I'm expecting a massacre this week!

Returning to camp, Jeremy is all "BIG MOVE TONY!".  Ben is mad at Jeremy for going along with it.  Ben is mad about 80% of this season.  Jeremy tells him to just chill out and play the game.  

Sarah on the other hand goes ballistic at Tony.  Calls it a "grimy ass move" that sunk her game.  The move to a more private part but everyone an still hear her yelling at him.  She doubts they still have the numbers.  "If I get voted off, do not every talk to me again".  So, soapbox time, this is why this season has bothered me, it's like Survivor with Friends instead of just Survivor.  Tony tells her to put her man panties on, this is war.  

Tony tries to smooth things over with Ben by saying it was just this one time!  I promise I will go back to my original alliance.  He tells Ben he has an idol and that he wants to go to the end with insipid, angry Ben.  LOL.  Who wouldn't!! Ben says that he blindsided him and Jeremy is still there.  Ben wants Jeremy gone next.  

Next morning, Tony realizes he's in trouble and he needs a little undercover operation.  He climbs the tree over the water hole and, with Sarah's help, makes a "spy nest".  Sarah tells him "it's golden".  She thinks he's non stop go (it's called manic honey)  and he's going to get himself voted off.  

Jeremy tries to talk to Ben and he ignores him.  Jeremy tells Kim that Ben is a child.  Kim is emphatic that Jeremy not go home.  She says Tony has to go.  Kim tells Denise, them Ben, then Michelle and then Nick that Tony has to go.  They're all in.  Kim decides she has to do something.

On exile, the beautiful people get a challenge.  "Chance to win fire tokens, requires tremendous effort".  It's another one of these carry shit up and down the "mountain".  20 coconuts and the first 6 people get 2 tokens.  Rob feels like he has an edge so he's literally running up and down like he's one of these young people and not just some old guy still living off a 39 day reality show adventure.  He finally decides he should slow down and let someone else set the pace.  Tyson can't keep up with the "girls",  Adam is literally the former fat kid that still never learned to run even with 6 years of remedial PE.  

The tide starts coming in and people are getting wet and having to jump over rocks.  Rob slips and falls and "cracks his elbow" and I get all excited that he will have to leave the show curing one more of my alternate anxiety producing problems.  But it's apparently not really broken because although he loses, he's still there.  No aussie medic today.  

Natalie the challenge beast comes first, followed by Sophie, Yul, Tyson and amazingly Parv.  Wendell bets the last spot when Danni falls.   Rob keeps going even after the challenge because of some reason.  Probably because the camera kept following him.  

Back on the real beach, Jeremy talks to Sarah.  Says that he and Ben used to be close but now Ben won't talk to him.  

Nick says NOW is my time to crank it up.  Says he and Michelle and Denise are down with working with him and he needs a BIG MOVE.  

Tony talks to Sarah and says they are in trouble.  NO SHIT SHERLOCK.  Says they need to find Sophie's idol.  Everyone is looking for it.  Ben and Tony are looking in the same area and talking, and Ben casually finds it and tries to hide it.  Tony calls him on it and they Bro it around and hug and "now we trust each other".  Ben says now they can begin picking everyone off,.. and then he carries Tony off into the woods.  

Immunity Challenge:  Stand on a perch with a hand tethered to a big bucket overhead. Both a male and a female immunity and fire tokens.  

At one point Jeff brings out the milk and cookies and Kim and Michelle take them leaving  Denise to win.  At the end Nick takes the cookies and Tony wins.  Denise tells Tony they're done and he won immunity.  "Come help me unhook the strap so i don't get wet.  

Kim is mad that her plan is foiled by Tony winning.  Maybe your pals could have challenged him at the immunity challenge instead of bailing for damn cookies.  Denise and Nick say Tony is now on the back burner.  Nick is all happy because Tony have him a fire token back and he got cookies.  None of these pussies should win.  

Michelle says she is distraught about Jeremy going home.  She offers him her 50/50 coin.  

Ben tells Tony that people were going to blindside him and Tony goes off the manic edge.  WHO  WHO WHO?  Ben tells him Kim and Tony is on a rampage.  Tony confronts Nick about it and Nick is a sniveling bumbling idiot.  Tony knows he's lying and is now 100% worried about Kim.  

Sarah asks Tony if it's Jeremy.  Tony asks Ben if he's 100% on Jeremy.  "Just hear me out here...." Tony wants Kim, says now that Nick can't be trusted.  Ben reminds Tony that Nick literally just gave him immunity.  Tony says they can stick together and get rid of "these rats". Ben tells him they'll get Kim next.  

Tony tells Jeremy that everyone is coming for him.  Jeremy tries to talk to Ben about Kim but Ben still won't talk to him.  Michelle gives Jeremy the 50/50.  

Tribal
Denise says last week was like bad family therapy that unleashed total chaos.
Kim says everything changes every day
Jeremy says it feels like it's shifting every hour
Jeff reminds Michelle that practically everyone dropped out of the challenge.  She says that " me and Kim were tore up with regret"

Jeremy and Tony start talking and Ben is watching.  I HATE THIS TALKING DURING TRIBAL SHIT.
Kim gets up and talks to Jeremy.  Sarah get up...

Nick says this is just common occurrence now.  Denise says they can't even get through one tribal with out this shit. Everyone is up talking except Ben and Sarah.

Kim asks why Tony is doing this?  Jeff asks Sarah if there is a point where you stop? And she says she is at her peak.  They can't shut off.  
Ben tells Sarah that Jeremy is saying it's her.  Denise says I'M DONE!!!  I'm ready to vote!!! Jeremy asks her if she's sure she wants to do that?  

Vote

Anyone have an idol?  Tony says, can you give me a minute?  He talks to Jeremy.  He asks Sarah if she's good.  Says he was going to play an idol for Sarah and she says "don't bother".

Jeremy gets 3 votes, Kim gets 5.  Boston Rob says that Tony is a boss, dude.  


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