Survivor Week 2

Wow, it seems like it should be more than just week 2.  Whole lot of drama going on!  Note: the show is taking place on a Polynesian Island, although it has no name apparently. 

So the ladies return to the ONE WORLD camp, minus Courtney. Mike is there to greet them, saying "I took care of your fire for you",  Nice, but he was really there to get the dirt. 

Alicia is all happy about tribal council, says it went just as she had planned it.  Christina comes over to talk to her and try to smooth things over but Alicia is just rude.  "We're fine" said in that way that most men know means "I wouldn't close my eyes tonight if I were you..."  She says she's let Christina drown, because she has her 5. 

Sabrina, who is just sooo clearly a teacher, calls a meeting.  Says they need a leader and a plan.  They elect her as leader, which she calls 'managing the airheads'.  Not sure if volunteering to herd these cats was a good strategy.  It's clear that there is a young girl old lady thing going on. 

Tree mail: 2 very large boxes with a note saying it's a do it yourself challenge.  Harrumph.  Jeff was probably busy sweet talking his new wife, that little bitch.  Teams have to untie the knots in the box to win a tarp and some Martha Steward for Target camp furniture for reward.  They clearly have not handed out the bathing suits yet.  Tarzan is in a mini speedo grape smuggler thing.  It's gross.  Someone in gray underwear missed the pixilation fairy, and not in a good way. 

So, once you until the box, there's just a ginormous bunch of knots to be untied.  Seriously, I haven't seen anything like that since I looked in the bottom of my jewelry box.  It's a close challenge but the men win. 

They all set up their tarp and set about decorating the man-beach.  All except Colton who just does nothing and then tries to hang with the girls.  They keep sending him away.  He has the sadz.  Finally Sabrina is all, 'dude we're going to have a meeting now and you have to leave".  She says he's like a virus and there's no cure for him.  He comes back and cries that he has no friends on the island...please let me stay..... 

Later, Tarzan is doing some very strange and totally not erotic dance.  It's just freaky considering there is no alcohol in ONE WORLD.  Colton shows the 4 non-frat boys the immunity idol.  They are geeked out of their minds at the implications.  "We have GOT to get rid of the muscle". 

Challenge, Jeff is in green.  Hmmm, it might not be a recycled challenge and there might not be a puzzle.  What is this ONE WORLD we've stumbled onto??  It's a very long balance beam out in the water.  Each tribe lines up and the people the most farther out have to basically cross over the others on the way to the end platform.  NO MORE THAN 2 PLAYERS CAN TOUCH.  Tarzan sits out, oh and Hoooorayyyyy they have swimsuits. 

The dwarf goes first for the men and nails it.  The women just plain suck at it.  Kat goes first and is a total idiot.  Half the time she jumps in the water when she doesn't need to.  They are just awful.  And I think it must be a female unconscious response to reach out to help people who need help because the 3 people touching thing kills them. 

Bottom line, men kick ass and win immunity yet again. 

Back home, will it be Nina or will it be Kat?  The older women are trying to strategize how to go to the younger women and break up their alliance.  Nina talks to Chelsea who works on Kim.  They are both troubled by what a spaz Kat is but they're not sure they want to break the alliance. 

Tribal:
Jeff starts right off saying this is the worse start in Survivor history for any tribe.  Hmmmm, even after just 2 weeks?  But I'll take him at his word.  He asks what the strengths are and Kim says she's a good communicator.  Jeff kind of loses it and says "I feel like I'm talking to 6th graders!  He points out that it is a very dysfunctional tribe.  He asks if people have gotten to know each other. 
Nina, do these women know what skills you bring to the table?  I don't know Jeff, some people know I am a retired police officer who does well with stress and is physical.  She asks "what does Kat bring to the table??"
Kat says she's good in the outdoors, she's in sales so she's good with people but that she's young.  She says she knows she let the tribe down.
Nina points out that Kat is in fact not a great athlete, and that she went in the water twice when she didn't need to.  She can't handle stress.
Kim says, "it's between Nina and Kat this week". 
Chelsea admits that given what the now know, they would all probably form different alliances. 
Monica concedes that they don't listen to the older women.  'Monica figured out the challenge but nobody was listening to her".
Kat cries and says, "it's all my fault.  I've never failed at anything before".
Jeff is all, "you've never failed at anything before???  WTF???"
Kat: I don't try anything if I could fail it.  Kat also tries to throw Christina under the bus, saying she isn't playing the game but that goes unchallenged. 
Sabrina: "This is why men are different".

Time to vote.  Second person voted off is Nina.