Most Insane Tribal Ever!!

5

5 times

5 times is how many times I have watched this tribal to understand completely what happened.

Just for you all :)

Also I think this is one of the most pivotal moments in this season, which I have realized isn't giving rise to a lot of funny updates!  Anyway I wrote up a completely different summary and then thought I needed to rewatch the tribal, so now I am completely changing this update!

So basically I think we need to go back and understand the dynamics of where we are in order to handle this episode-and y'all might be totally getting this already and not needing the remedial educating but here goes!

Where we are is 2 original tribes, with the first one, Lesu, kind of disorganized as hell.  There are basically 5 of them left, with 3 of them- Wardog, Kelley and Lauren basically  Siamese triplets having one head.  Which is good for The Wardog because when he looks full on into the camera it's clear there's not much of his brain there.  Among the original Lesu's there are also David and Rick which, in current Survivor fashion formed an alliance about 6 seconds in.   When Rick was voted off and then brought back he basically change his alliance to the other original tribe, the Kama.  Since then Rick and David have been a bit on the outs yet they are still connected through joint custody of 2 halves of an idol, and the fact that David is 1) a very forgiving person and 2) someone without a lot of other friends.  As someone said last tribal, the problem with Lesu is that they can't get their shit together and function as one-even though they have been down in the numbers from the merge.  

The other group playing a completely other game is Kama STRONG.  This consists of now 6 people because they have been eating their own since the merge.  There is Ron and Julie, who are basically the older parents, and then the youngsters Gavin, Julia, Aurora and Victoria.  They have been working with Rick recently although they suffered a pretty big split last week when G/J/A/V broke off and worked with W/K/L to get rid of Eric-who with Ron were running the game.  It was a massive break from Kama Strong and appeared to be a "game change".  

So this week begins post Eric's ouster and Ron and Julie are pissed, for the loss of Eric but particularly in Julie's case she is pissed that they didn't give her the information and she found herself basically lied to and left hung out to dry.  This basically is the entire theme of this episode and could be Kama Strong's down fall.  Ron is mostly just "screw it, I'm going to be a passenger from now on".  Gavin tries to smooth things over with him basically with the old "I wanted to stand up and get noticed for my resume by throwing the first punch".  

W/K/L are wondering where things stand with them now and thinking perhaps they have convinced the Kama Kids to join them.  Gavin pledges his undying loyalty to them and says that he can bring Victoria and Julia along with him.  

Rick and David are still in couples therapy and wondering how they can move forward in this new game.  David appears to be on the fence without any strong alliance.  David and Rick decide their best option is to re-establish trust with Ron and Julie who are pissed with the Kama's.  

David and Rick talk to Ron and Julie at the watering hole and they discuss being a voting block of 4.  Julie is very adamant that she is DONE WITH KAMA STRONG.  Julie has a meltdown, saying her game is completely upended and she doesn't know who she should trust anymore.  They're discussing who could join them and work with them and they throw out Aurora or the Wardog group?  Julie is VERY EMPHATIC that Julia is very strong and very strategic and she says those Kama Kids think they are going to be the final 4.  

Gavin talks to Julia and suggests the plan should be them, plus Victoria and the W/K/L group to get rid of David.  Gavin is especially set on David going home.  They're all standing around with Kelley and Lauren discussing it and Lauren keeps pushing for Ron to go not David.  Julia is a bit concerned by this and decides she needs to re-visit the social game of everyone.  She realizes that the W/K/L group is a very strong alliance and isn't sure how the 6 would mix.  

Immunity Challenge-it comes down to Gavin and David and Gavin wins.  He now thinks he can say that "I'm the reason David went home tonight" on his resume.  LOL, this resume padding shit reminds me of one I got from a recent college graduate that actually listed membership in the Smithsonian institute as an attribute-he basically paid the membership that gets you the magazine and a membership card.  Still makes me laugh. 

Once back at camp everyone scrambles to their current alliances leaving David, Rick and Julia at camp.  Rick tries to break up the new Kama Kids/ Lesu 3 alliance by pitching how strong the W/K/L group is. He makes the same pitch to Gavin and then to Victoria and is trying to be patient with this new alliance breaking down.  

Kelley and Lauren are afraid if they work with the Kama Kids to get rid of David then Kama Strong could get back together and they 3 would be in even worse shape.  Lauren keeps pushing for Ron over David, making the point that Ron has way more connections in the game than David does.  Lauren makes her case to Julia, who is now all worried why the Lesu 3 are so adamant about Ron over David, thinking now they are trying to bamboozle them to get rid of another Kama and keep David.  Julia is now wondering if they should go back to Kama Strong.  She talks to Victoria who wants to get rid of Kelley- "get rid of the queen and the hive will collapse".  

Ron is like, whatever you want.  Julie doesn't believe anything anyone is telling her.  

Ron, Victoria,Gavin and Julie talks about who Kama Strong would go after and they say Kelley.  Gavin pitches a fit because he wants David and isn't getting his way, screaming DICTATORSHIP, which is apparently millennial for "I did not get my way".  

They're all eating and it's dead quiet.  David says his spidey sense is telling him it's him.  He talks to Rick about it and he agrees so they decide the 2 part idol should be used for him tonight.  Also during the quiet dinner Julia gives Kelley the big nod and indicates that she's all on board with them.  Kelley is weirded out by it and is very confused because although Julia is basically giving her the heads up, neither Victoria or Aurora will talk to her.  Kelley says her gut is telling her to play her idol.  

And then we go to tribal and it's not even 8:30!!!

Soooooo, to recap the recap we go into tribal with 2 potential plans, each based upon where GVJA come down.  Plan 1 is WKL join with GVAJ to vote out David.  Plan 2 is Kama Strong comes back together to vote out Kelley.  David and Ron are basically left out and Ron and Julie think it's plan 2 but Julie doesn't trust that's true.  

So right out of the gate Jeff brings up the blindside and Julie says she is still mad about being on the wrong side of it and she doesn't trust anyone. Aurora, in her first speaking role, says that you can't really bring a lot of people into a blindside, and she points out that the time before other people were also left out so there could be a blindside.

Wardog's expression is priceless as he points out that she basically said "last time we needed to use people to take out Eric, and this time we are using people to take out someone else".  And he asks her "is it our plan or am I just a passenger on your plan?" Kelley agrees and says that's the vibe I'm getting too-I was trying to establish trust with people BUT I am also afraid Kama Strong is going to get back together so I'm not sure what's gonna happen tonight.  

David, in response to something Jeff asks him, says earlier today he was taking a poop in the water, watching a school of minnows swimming by when a shark came up and ate some of the minnows.  And he says that tonight it is likely that with a reconstituted Kama, a Lesu will be a minnow tonight.  

Jeff asks Devins if he's a minnow or a shark tonight and Devins says he might be the poop.  He says he has no idea what is going to happen-says 4 people were the hot date today (GVJA) and they were going to get back to us but they blew us off.  Gavin says they weren't avoiding them but people were breaking off and coming back with new plans all day.  

Julie melts down again, saying she feels like a lunatic but this game is so hard.  She says she's not in a clear mind (ok, let's also point out she's basically been skating on Kama Strong the entire game and this is the first time she's had to think) and she's not sure she's been told the correct plan and it could be another blindside.  

Kelley is all WHAAAAAT???  Surprised that there might be another plan and she asks Aurora and Julia if they are good and Julia says "we are all good".  

Ron is also saying that this vote will tell Julie and I where we stand and we'll feel better if things go as we think tonight.  

Jeff them inserts himself into the game at this point (IMO) telling Julie she isn't a lunatic but also calling Julia out for laughing while Julie was pouring her heart out.  He asks Julia what was so funny and she tells him she was laughing because while she was talking Kelley asked if we were good AND I SAID YES.  

And then BOOM!!!  Rick points out that Julia just gave the game away-says "I guess they are going with the Lesu 3!!"  Not sure if Rick believes it but he has successfully inserted the knife into Ron and Julie and is now about to twist them free from Kama Strong.

Aurora wades into it by saying "I love how Lesu, either together or split, are playing the game.  She says they must think basically Kama is stupid in not realizing that perhaps Lesu figured out last tibal that if they get together and get over their issues they could work together. Says they're  "We're with you and are going to blindside and then the other side is all we're with YOU and are going to do a blindside..." What they're trying to do is create mistrust.  

W/K/L are all frowning and confused.....

Rick says "hey, ask Eric or Aubry or Joe how good Kama can trust each other....."

David is totally laughing at the turn of events!

Aurora says that she's not saying they are the only dysfunctional tribe, she says Kama owns up to their dysfunction.  David and Wardog are amused-" we never said we weren't dysfunctional!!!"

During this back and forth Julia tells Aurora "you are spilling the beans" to which Aurora replies "no I'm not....THEY DON'T KNOW...."

Rick then "throws this out there" that there seems to be a Kama group that doesn't want anyone questioning them, and then there are 5 Lesu and 2 Kama which is 7 and if we do that we could do whatever we want since Aurora wants Lesu to work together.  Julia is all "oh I thought Lesu was all dysfunctional but now Rick is throwing this plan out there".  Rick points out "I think Aurora threw it out there, I'm just on board with it...."

Julia tells Rick, "you're just a passenger" to which he says "Passenger??  Hell I think I just got the GPS...."  He says he can see why Julia doesn't want this to happen but they could " take the power away from the Kama Kids who are just messing with us".  Julia tells him he is just paranoid because he's not part of the "many plans tonight" and he asks her "then shouldn't I make my own plan Julia??"  

Things quickly begin to spin out of control as Wardog talks to Ron and Julie (who are incidentally sitting by themselves surrounded by Lesu....) and says I'll work with you.  

Aurora says "oh so now you are making plans for Ron and Julie??"  And he points out that he's not making plans but broaching a GREAT idea....

Julie says that Rick's proposal sounds good to her.  Wardog continues to talk to Ron.  David is just enjoying it all and says there's a whole lot of desperation tonight!!  

Wardog tells Ron-Aurora??  I'll go Aurora.  Everyone is all up and talking and moving around and David taps Kelley on the back and says "hey remember me?"  But then Ron calls David and Rick over and he's like "hang on..."  So in one corner is David, Rick, Wardog and Lauren, with Ron and Julie and Victoria is trying to get in and stop the talking.  Rick goes back to Kelley and says "a truce could go a loong way tonight..."  

Kelley talks to J/G/A and asks if the plan was THE plan tonight?  and they tell her yes.  She tells them she isn't going to turn on them.  

Julie is good with the new plan says lets do it and then TAKE THEM ALL OUT.  Ron says, "we could take Victoria out tonight" and she is standing right there.  Rick looks over and says "it looks like we aren't going to have Kelley tonight.  Julie is heard saying "I'd go for Julia over Aurora tonight" and Wardog is all "you want that name?  I could go for that name...you pick the name!!"  

Lauren walks over to Kelley to talk to her and Julia gets up and pours gasoline on the fire by getting pissy with them.  Julie yells I AM OUT!!  Says she has seen the looks they have all been passing all day!!!  

David asks Kelley what the plan was tonight and she admits it was him.  

Aurora gets up and says "OMG I can't deal with these soccer moms..."

(BY THE WAY THE JURY IS LOVING EVERY SECOND OF THIS TRIBAL)

Kelley finally tells Rick and David  "if you want to do a plan, let's do a plan!"

Julia is yelling at Julie that she is going to throw away KAMA control and Julie is all I DON'T HAVE ANY KAMA CONTROL!!!  Says she is on the bottom and ready to jump ship-which she illustrates by running over to Rick, David, Kelley and Lauren.  Wardog is still  negotiating and vote counting.  Ron suddenly starts looking nervous and is being worked on by G,V and Julia.  He calls Julie back over. Victoria tells Lauren and Wardog she told them to vote David, and David is all I HEARD THAT.  LOL!  

Wardog says "let's vote" and Julia tells him to shut up.  Rick says he was criticized for bringing up the idea but "I'm glad I did!"  

Everyone slowly starts returning to their seats and then they say WE ARE READY TO VOTE.  

Rick plays the 2 halves of the idol for David but it wasn't necessary because the vote is 1 David, 1 Kelley and all the rest turned on Julia!  

WHEW!!!!!  My head is still spinning!  And at the end Wardog says "RIIIIICK DEVINS!!!" 

And that, boys and girls, is how you build your resume!!!!!  

(is anyone still reading?????  LOL!!!)