Hmmm, last week. We start off with Amanda being mad at Candace. "She has to go". (Drink).
Nighttime in the jungle, and the Etroll is wide awake. He never sleeps, being consumed 24/7 with evil. Rob is also awake, waiting for him. They chat. Etroll tries to make Rob think he's not really against him. Rob tells him, "people are mad about the idol". The troll denies having it. Rob is all about making Etroll even more crazy and paranoid. "Watch your back, man".
Tree mail: "Never Give Up Even at the End of Your Rope". Colby is wondering if it is a physical challenge, and what that means for James. I got $20 on that same question, Colby.
Challenge, Jeff is in light blue. I wasn't really in the mood anyway. It's straight into a immunity challenge, with a twist. Both tribes will go to tribal, the winners get to watch the losers vote someone off while they enjoy shoveling hot dogs and drinks down their gullets.
It's another in the Survivor HALL OF FAME challenges, a rope obstacle. Basically fences with ropes tied all around them, and the players have to crawl around to untwist the rope. The Dragon Slaya, JT and Tyson have done this before.
Heroes go first. Lots of butt shots. Colby, as usual, SUCKS at this challenge. James is kicking ass even with his knee. Candace and JT get through the first section first, and Candace wins immunity.
Villains are up next, and I actually think a week later Sandra is still trying to figure this challenge out. It's Rob, Tyson and Etroll neck and neck, but in the end Rob wins immunity. Clearly this is a thin person's challenge, not a fat ass troll with a lower center of gravity person's challenge.
Rob takes on Candace in the elementary school jungle gym Survivor has flown in and built in the jungle. I hope they leave it for the displaced little children of Somoa, instead of selling it on ebay. Rob barely squeaks it out. Rob wins the challenge for the Villains.
Villainland: Pervhottie is on the list of people to to,but Rob wants Etroll to think it is him and use the idol. Coach, as we know, has another alliance with the devil, aka Russell. Rob to Russell: "If you have the idol, you better get it, otherwise it's been real". Which makes the troll fume: "Ima gonna git him to eat his words". He decides to give Perv the idol and then vote for Tyson.
Heroland: Colby "James beat me brace and all". Colby says to the tribe, I know it's me so let's have a nice day and not give anything away tonight at Tribal. Colby and James chat. "Sleepy ass Colby gets beat by a fat man and a cripple. It's not the old Colby".
Amanda, JT and Rupert chat Colby or James. JT: "Our 5 has to be the strongest".
Amanda talks to James, tells him he has to show that he can run and jump, but also that he needs to learn the etiquette of bananas. She tells him people are mad that he eats too many bananas, and never offers to get anyone any bananas. This statement alone is why I could never survive. James declares it's Hero Olympics time, challenges JT to a race. Colby is busy floating in the water. James and JT race, JT wins but James puts up a good effort. "James is a fighter and powerful". "Hey, JT, would you like a banana??" LOL.
V: Rob wants to ensure that the troll doesn't double cross him. He wants to split the vote between Etroll and Pervhottie. Good thought.
Etroll talks to Tyson, tells him "I'm voting for Pervhottie:. Tyson, who is a freaking idiot, changes his vote to Pervhottie as well.
Tribal Villains (wow, I didn't even notice what color Jeff was wearing).
Jerri: In what way has Survivor changed? The game is on from the start.
Rob: Hidden immunity idols, we never had them when I played
Sandra: We all know who has it.
Etroll: If you ain't got it you can't play it
Tyson: Jeff, I am a total tool, so let me just say that the idol isn't that important at this point in the game.
Perv: Tyson is a threat because he has connections on the other side.
Sandra: Pervhottie has slept with half of the Heroes.
Time to vote. Best line ever: Sandra as she is voting: "Russell, it's time for you to get in the ocean and wash your ass out."
Anyone have the idol? Russell plays it but gives it to Perv as payment for sexual favors. The vote is Russell 2, Perv 4 and Tyson 3. Tyson screwed himself out of the game. Rob, looks stunned.
Tribal II, Heroes. Villains are scarfing hot dogs. Rupert can't take his eyes off the food.
James: I raced JT today. Jeff, What??
Amanda: A lot of people would have lost to JT.
Colby: Huh? Wassup? I just said how much I want to stay
James: Colby is the best former player but he's superman in a girdle. I wanna be here AND I now know banana etiquette.
Time to vote. Colby gets 1 vote, James gets 4. Waaaaaaa.
James (and me): "Ima gonna be good and drunk in the next 5 minutes".
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