Survivor Redemption Island: Crazy Time Already!!

Oh man, that was the best week one show I have ever watched!! Let's let the crazy out of the bag on day one, shall we?

Helicopters arrive and drop off the Survivors. And then....another helicopter. Out steps Rob and Russell. Together Jeff tells us they have 156 days if experience playing Survivor. I think they need real jobs...

Francesca is not happy. They are trouble makers, sizing us up. They draw for teams and Rob gets the O team, Russell the Z team. Yea, the team names are longer but I don't feel like looking them up right now.

Here's the new thang this year. When you are voted off you go to redemption island and live alone. The next loser joins you there and you square off in a "duel". The remaining person will be able to reenter the game at some point. Russell thinks redemption is gonna be a vacation. I think Russell will be there shortly.

The X team. Russell is already an asshole. Apparently CRAFTSMAN tools are a sponsor because for the first time ever the Survivors get nails and hammers and stuff. WTF??

On O, Rob's all helpful. Matt calls it camp harmony. Phillip is very pushy and A FORMER FEDERAL AGENT. You will hear those words 500 times. Francesca doesn't like him. Phillip calls them over and announces he's a FORMER FEDERAL AGENT, and is an expert at analyzing people which will be GREAT when they merge. He also has 7 sisters. Not sure what that comment means, maybe he's willing to rent them out. Francesca doesn't care.

Kristina wonders why nobody is looking for an idol? She goes out looking and Rob totally busts her doing it.

Phillip is trying to suck up to Rob, forming a "he male alliance". Phillip and Kristina talk. "Rob is going to try to divide and conquer and play me like a fool. We can work together."

X: Russell as usually sucks right up to the young cute blonde. They go looking for tree mail together and he is hitting on her already. He forms a secret alliance with her. Mike, David and someone else see Russell talking to Stephanie. They want Russell gone ASAP.

O: Kristen doesn't want Rob to stay but everyone else likes him. WHY would you want to get rid of someone with so much experience who you KNOW will never win the game? She is a control freak and thinks he will take control away from her. Kristen takes a shovel (they get shovels too?? christ, how about cable and a mini Kenmore Elite refrigerator??) and goes looking for the idol. She finds it right away. She is Russell's long lost daughter. She re hides the idol.

OMFG. Phillip is wearing red BVDs. I kid you not. Now I believe we know why he is a FORMER federal agent. Things haven't been as much fun since Hoover left. He's standing in his underwear giving attitude to Kristen and Francesca. Total idiot. Let me also point out that his red package DOES NOT NEED PIXELATION, as it is not visible. Even in HD. How do you argue with someone in red underwear?? Wonder what he washed his white load with to ruin it all.

Challenge. My dimpled darling is in dark blue. Ahhhhhhhhh. Each tribe will push four blocks along a track to build the base of a temple. They will then run up the steps where one person will use an ax to chop a series of ropes releasing another set of steps. They’ll then make their way to the top where they will race to solve a block puzzle, which will complete their temple.

O sucks at this. Z gets their stairs done first, gets their puzzle and has a big lead. Russell is calling the shots. For O, Matt cannot chop the ropes. He's pathetic. Finally. Rob is the puzzle master but he can't overcome Z's lead. Z wins immunity. Ashley: "We let Rob down".
Back at camp, all hell starts breaking out. Kristina tells Francesca she has the idol. Let's talk them all into voting for me and then we blindside Rob. Francesca thinks they still need him. Everyone will be pissed if we get rid of Rob. She wants to get rid of Natalie. Kristina admits, “Voting Natalie is better for the tribe. Voting Rob is better for me.

Rob knows Kristina was looking for the idol. He calls everyone except Kristen, Francesca and Phillip together and tells them about her looking for the idol. They decide to split their votes between Kristen and Francesca and flush out the idol. They all agree.

Kristen and Francesca approach Phillip with their plan. He doesn't see how the 3 of them voting for Rob is gonna work, so she shows him the idol. He agrees with her plan because he wants Rob out so he can be the new tribe leader.

Tribal. They all get fire. Fire = Life in this game. I think I will get a Fire = Life tattoo. Who's with me? Won't Jeff be surprised when he finds THAT!
Rob tells Jeff that his tribe got right to work when they first arrived at camp to build a good shelter. He credits Phillip in setting the tone of hard work for everyone. Jeff asks Phillip if he assumed the leadership role. Phillip replies, “Not necessarily the leadership role, but if I see work that needs to be done, I’ll suggest it.” Francesca rolls her eyes at Phillip’s response.

Matt, Is Phillip the leader? He calls people out, and that's not that well received
Francesca: We need to keep this tribe strong
Kristina: I don't feel safe
Rob-are the men safe? "I don't feel safe"
Jeff asks Francesca about redemption island. "it makes the game more complex. Like if Rob gets voted out tonight...NOT THAT HE'S GOING TO...but he could come back.
Phillip calls her out on that. Francesca and he go at it, she telling him that she "never told him to vote for Rob". Kristina calls Phillip unstable and he tells everyone her whole plan, including the fact that she has the idol.
Jeff: Who is that news to?
Rob: "um, ME". They don't deny having the idol. Rob wants to see it. "Give me the idol tonight and you will get to stay". Nope.

Time to vote. Anyone have the idol and want to use it? Nope.

Kristen gets 3 votes, Phillip gets 2 and Francesca is the first occupant of Redemption Island.