Survivor Africa Week 3

Wow, night 9 already. Who'd have though we could go 9 nights out in the African outback without a vicious animal attack. Damn it.

On Kota Ace is stewing over the fact that Kelly voted for him. Ace is a pain in the ass. After last week's comment about his accent being fake, I checked out his bio. He was born in, like, Florida, but raised in England. Went to English boys boarding school (some fancy name one). Uhuh. You KNOW what they say about those English boarding schools...Anyway, he's now a watch salesman. "Cartier", as in psssst, you wanna buy a Kartier watch?

Over on Fang, we're repeating the rice argument. haha. In my house the argument is usually, "didn't we have rice already once this year?" Randy now wants to go to once a day. Apparently he's backed up. Matty, Susie and Dan all go "fruit picking" which is code for forming an alliance since I don't see a whole lot of fruit laying around.

Challenge time: Rank your tribe mates on most useful or importance or something like that. It's done in private and Jeff reveals the results. For Kota: Marcus, Ace, Bob, Charlie, Jacque, Corrine, Sugar and then Kelly. For Fang: Matty, Dan, Randy (which is bullsh*t), Crystal, Ken, GC and then Susie. GC is pissed. Says, "Not 2 good for a Pimp" (which is from Hustle and Flow, a movie I highly recommend). Hey Sellman, remember when we had that living will discussion and I said you can pull the plug when my clothing doesn't match? Take note of Randy's outfit here-this is plug pullable.

So, SURPRISE, the whole point of this is to assist with picking new teams. Marcus and Matty get to be new team leaders and chose new members. Apparently even the crew can't stand this season anymore.

New Teams (Fang): Marcus, Dan, Charlie, Randy, Corrine, Susie and Bob
(Kota): Matty, Ace, Crystal, Jacque, Ken, Kelly ("cause she's hot") and the pimp. Sugar is unchosen and sent to Exile until someone's voted off.

Sugar goes to Exile to her "sugar shack" and just lays around for a couple of days. Hey, is it my imagination or is her suit reversible?

On Fang, Crystal notices that Kelly doesn't like Ace and Jacque.

Tree Mail is a lacrosse stick. WTF-was lacrosse invented in Africa? And, I gotta step up to the anti-racism platform here and ask why we don't get a lesson in African contributions to culture this time around like we got stuffed down our throats in China?

Immunity Challenge is water lacrosse. Everyone is in little boats with paddles and they are trying to knock a ball into a net. Randy has finally found his sport. Unfortunately, once off the island he's gonna have to go to Hershey Park's Water World to practice up. Ace, who has an overblown sense of his importance keeps leaving the net (he's supposed to be goalie) which results in another Randy score. Kelly sucks. Well, let me take that back. She would suck if she were actually playing the game. She's not too bad just sitting still in the boat. Ken sucks, which you pretty much would expect. Randy scores for the 3rd and final time, giving Kota immunity. Jeff points out that it was one of the worst performances ever. Dang, getting it from the Probster.

On Fang, another episode of "who are we getting rid of?" It seems a no brainer Kelly will be going. Despite their new alliance, Crystal, GC, and Ken want Kelly—at first. After jawing it over, they think Jacque is in too tight with Sugar and Ace and would be a threat when reunited. All are concerned about Ace having too much power, but no one seems to have the balls to vote him off. Matty goes to Jacque and tells her she might be voted off. Jacque then begins her campaign to stay in, working every angle she can muster. It will either be Kelly or Jacque. Could be either. Wish it were Ace.

Tiki torches are burning and the fake set is all lit up. Jeff asks his usual probing questions. No real drama. Time to vote. It's tight between Kelly and Jacque but surprisingly Jacque gets the boot.